2.It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

In recent times, some argue that it is more popular among students to have a

year

off between school and university. The in-depth analysis in the following paragraphs intends to discuss why the positive points of

this

trend outweigh the negative points. Despite the fact that having a

year

off

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

some advantages, there are some drawbacks behind it.

While

students have a

year

off before going to an educational institution, they might find something else for the rest of their lives, so they may entirely forget about studying.

For example

, consider a young person who follow painting as a hobby in that

year

, and

then

he or she thinks they would not

require

Wrong verb form

be required

show examples

to continue their education.

Thus

, It might be harmful to their personal or work lives.

Furthermore

, pupils may experience enjoyment in

this

gap ,and

then

they just want to have fun and never be exhausted from studying

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

rules, and regulations of the educational system.

As a result

, they would never pursue their education. Being a

year

off from studying and books would give pupils an amount of time which could be used completely beneficial. It means that they would have enough time and days to think about their interest and do a lot of research to find out better about the field that they want to pursue in the future.

Additionally

, they would be able to promote some skills, whether related to the field they consider for themselves or not. It could be a skill just

in addition

to the main course.

For instance

, if they want to follow IT or computer in the university, they could be taught about programming. In that case, they would put themselves in the condition the same as they

tought

Correct your spelling

fought

thought

for their future. Not only is there a chance to learn a new topic, but

also

they could imagine themselves in that situation and understand whether they are keen on studying that subject or not. After scrutinizing both sides, what can be concluded is that

although

a gap between school and university could have some unpredictable consequences

such

as quitting completely from studying, it would be advantageous for pupils to think more and do some research or even foster their skills.

Submitted by royakarimi435 on Mon Mar 11 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

To improve task response, ensure that you answer all parts of the question fully. This means not only discussing both advantages and disadvantages but also making your position or opinion clear, especially in the conclusion. Consider adding a summary of points and reiterating your stance to make a stronger impact.

coherence cohesion

Enhance your essay's coherence by ensuring logical flow and clear connections between ideas. Use a wider range of cohesive devices to connect sentences and paragraphs more smoothly. This could include transitional phrases that show contrast (e.g., 'however,' 'on the other hand') or addition (e.g., 'furthermore,' 'in addition').

task achievement

Develop your main points further by providing more detailed examples. Instead of general statements, use specific scenarios, data, or studies to support your arguments. This not only strengthens your case but also shows your ability to apply ideas in a real-world context.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Get your IELTS Essential Vocabulary List —

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

372 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

personal growth
cultural exchange
employability
academic pressures
burnout
resume building
global awareness
academic skills deterioration
financial implications
structured educational environment
peer separation
readjusting
rigor

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
Too much emphasis is given for education of the young. More government money should be spent for the free time activity of young people. To what extend, do you agree or disagree ?
There is too much expense spent on educating the young generation and the officials should pay more attention to providing pleasure time activities for them. I totally agree with focusing more on extra action because it can not only help students relax but also improve their physical health.
5.5
band
In some large cities, people have to pay a fee when they drive their cars into the city centre, in a policy to reduce the number of cars in the city. Give reasons in support of and opposing this policy, and give your own opinion.
Nowadays more and more people move by the cars that is why in some large cities there are extra fees one needs to pay to enter the city and this fee was created in order to reduce the number of cars. I support this policy because the more cars , the more problems like traffic jams and car accidents.
5.5
band
Social media platforms are gaining in popularity in recent years. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages ? [241]
With the advent of the internet, society has witnessed a revolution in many aspects of life, and entertaining is of no exception. New kinds of pastimes have appeared and probably, one of the most prominent recreations is social media. Rarely do we see a person without a phone full of social media nowadays and it might be what people spend most of their times with. However, this raises a critical question of whether the incremental popularity of these new kinds of entertainment is actually beneficent or there may exist a potential risk to our daily lives. After weighing up both the merits and demerits of this practice, I myself believe that the former far outweighs the latter, thus substantiating further pursuit of the above enquiry.
7
band
Some people think that reading is always a good habit , others feel it depends on which books a person is reading . Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Reading is always a positive habit for some individuals, while others believe that it depends on the types of books they read. There are some advantages of reading such as gaining new knowledge, increasing individual ability, and stress reduction. This essay will discuss both perspectives before presenting my own opinion.
5
band
It is generally observed that almost all high level jobs are done by men. Does it mean that the government should encourage a certain percentage of these jobs to be reserved for women? Do you agree or disagree with this proposition.
In this essay, I want to argue and give my opinion on the question that; high-level jobs are done by men. Should the government encourage a certain percentage of these jobs to be reserved for women?

2.It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Too much emphasis is given for education of the young. More government money should be spent for the free time activity of young people. To what extend, do you agree or disagree ?

In some large cities, people have to pay a fee when they drive their cars into the city centre, in a policy to reduce the number of cars in the city. Give reasons in support of and opposing this policy, and give your own opinion.

Social media platforms are gaining in popularity in recent years. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages ? [241]

Some people think that reading is always a good habit , others feel it depends on which books a person is reading . Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

It is generally observed that almost all high level jobs are done by men. Does it mean that the government should encourage a certain percentage of these jobs to be reserved for women? Do you agree or disagree with this proposition.