Many countries have embraced tourism as a way to boost their economies and create jobs for local residents. However, some argue that tourism can have negative impacts on the environment and local cultures. What are advantages and disadvantages of tourism for a country.

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Introduction

Nowadays, many

countries

Use synonyms

have embraced

tourism

Use synonyms

as a way

raise

Fix the infinitive

to raise

show examples

their economies and lucrative jobs for local

humans

Use synonyms

but I think boost

tourism

Use synonyms

year by year.

Body paragraph 1

Many

countries

Use synonyms

have a lot of

tourism

Use synonyms

and

this

Linking Words

tourism

Use synonyms

developing day by day

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

also

Linking Words

Use synonyms

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

believe

tourism

Use synonyms

give

Change the verb form

gives

show examples

benefits

for

Change preposition

show examples

local residents.

Body paragraph 2

Moreover

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

tourism

Use synonyms

extremely

Add a missing verb

is extremely

show examples

good for some

people

Use synonyms

because many

humans

Use synonyms

might be occupied

also

Linking Words

government

Use synonyms

think should

developing

Change preposition

about developing

show examples

tourism

Use synonyms

in the near future.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, some visitors should come

beautiful

Change preposition

to beautiful

show examples

places

Use synonyms

in my country.

For instance

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

apply

show examples

tourism

Use synonyms

very superb for local

people

Use synonyms

and

Use synonyms

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

Use synonyms

humans give

Verb problem

provides

show examples

better work and home for some

people

Use synonyms

. I believe

tourism

Use synonyms

give

Correct subject-verb agreement

gives

show examples

good benefits for

Use synonyms

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

Body paragraph 3

In my opinion many

tourism

Use synonyms

can have

extremely

Add an article

an extremely

show examples

bad

affect

Replace the word

effect

show examples

on the

environment

Use synonyms

and local cultures

bacause

Correct your spelling

because

many

humans

Use synonyms

visit beautiful

places

Use synonyms

every year

after

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

places

Use synonyms

there are would be a lot of garbage and

this

Linking Words

rubbish

give

Verb problem

has

show examples

negative

Correct article usage

a negative

show examples

impact on the

environment

Use synonyms

. So, I think

tourism

Use synonyms

should

decrase

Correct your spelling

decrease

for stunning nature or

government

Use synonyms

humans

Use synonyms

think

different

Change preposition

of different

show examples

ways for

tourism

Use synonyms

Besides

Linking Words

that,

tourism

Use synonyms

affect in the near future to many

countries

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, now

tourism

Use synonyms

extremely developing

some

Change preposition

in some

show examples

countries

Use synonyms

and in my

country

Add a comma

country,

show examples

after

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

some

people

Use synonyms

visit different

places

Use synonyms

and

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

places

Use synonyms

might be rubbish. Rubbish bad

affect

Replace the word

effect

show examples

on the

environment

Use synonyms

and weather.

Conclusion

In conclusion,

Use synonyms

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

humans

Use synonyms

must prevent beautiful nature and

this

Linking Words

Change preposition

apply

show examples

problem

Add an article

the problem

a problem

show examples

should

be solve

Change the verb form

be solved

be solving

show examples

for visitors. I think some

tourism

Use synonyms

must decline for on the

environment

Use synonyms

soglomovsarvar

Mar 11, 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure clear organization of your essay with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Begin with stating the topic and outlining the points you plan to discuss.

coherence cohesion

Use cohesive devices (e.g., however, for example, on the other hand) to connect ideas and paragraphs smoothly. Avoid abrupt topic changes.

task achievement

Address the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages thoroughly. Include specific examples to support your points.

task achievement

Present your points clearly and concisely. Avoid repetition and ensure each paragraph introduces a new idea or argument. Use a variety of sentence structures to make your essay more interesting.

general

Remember to proofread your essay. Correct grammatical errors and ensure proper use of vocabulary and punctuation to enhance clarity.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

243 words

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Many countries have embraced tourism as a way to boost their economies and create jobs for local residents. However, some argue that tourism can have negative impacts on the environment and local cultures. What are advantages and disadvantages of tourism for a country.

Some people think the the main purpose of schools is to turn children into good citizens and workers, instead of benefiting them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The education of young people is highly prioritized in many countries. However, educating adults who cannot write or read is even more important, and governments should spend more money on this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal informations such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. some people say that this information may be relevant and useful, others disagree. discuss both views and include your opinion.

All education, primary , secondary, and further education, should be free to all people and paid for by the government. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that the best way to improve road transport safety is to let the driver test each year. To what extent do you agree or disagree?