Parents and teachers make many rules for children to increase good behaviour and protect them from danger. However, children wood benefit from fever rules and greater freedom. To what extent do. You agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The issue of whether parents ought to implement a lot of regulations for their

kids

Use synonyms

has prompted considerable debate.

Linking Words

While many

Change preposition

Many

show examples

advocates

Fix the agreement mistake

advocate

show examples

for

this

Linking Words

, because it enables the children to pick up good characters and

keep

Correct subject-verb agreement

keeps

show examples

them away from societal

pit holes

Correct your spelling

pitholes

, which I completely agree with. Others contend against it. Analyzing these facts will give a comprehensive overview of the subject matter.

Firstly

Linking Words

kids

Use synonyms

who are properly guided grow up with

good

Add an article

a good

show examples

set of behaviors

such

Linking Words

as empathy and collaboration.

For instance

Linking Words

, statistics from my recently completed capstone project

shows

Correct subject-verb agreement

show

show examples

that children under

direct

Add an article

the direct

show examples

care of teachers are

well behaved

Add a hyphen

well-behaved

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

Sudbury

community college

Correct your spelling

Community College

show examples

. Clearly,

this

Linking Words

could not be achieved if they were meant to obey fewer

rules

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

is one of the reasons

set

Wrong verb form

setting

show examples

down

rules

Use synonyms

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

important for growing up

kids

Use synonyms

Secondly

Linking Words

, it

also

Linking Words

keeps them away from dangers which could arise if they are allowed to roam freely.

For example

Linking Words

, I would probably be a drug addict which could have led to my death long ago, if not for my father’s strictness and guidance. Obviously,

this

Linking Words

is not what freedom would have saved me from.

Thus

Linking Words

, one of the benefits of increased

rules

Use synonyms

. In conclusion, the argument surrounding

Correct word choice

whether

show examples

kids

Use synonyms

should be under

strict

Add an article

the strict

show examples

watch of their parents and teachers

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

sparked a substantial dispute. Many champion

this

Linking Words

due to

Linking Words

it ensures they are well-behaved and

save

Correct subject-verb agreement

saves

show examples

them from any possible dangers, which I completely agree with.

Whereas

Linking Words

others challenge

this

Linking Words

. Examining these details proves that

kids

Use synonyms

are better off under the strict care laid down

rules

Use synonyms

and regulations.

Eby Thu Mar 14 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

To improve in the area of task response, make sure your essay fully addresses the topic by providing a balanced perspective, especially if you're asked to discuss to what extent you agree or disagree. It's important to explore arguments from both sides before stating your position clearly. Your essay tends to lean heavily on one side without adequately considering the opposite viewpoint, which can limit the completeness of your response. Try to include a paragraph that discusses potential benefits of greater freedom for children, even if your ultimate stance disagrees with this notion. This will show a more thorough engagement with the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion

To strengthen the coherence and cohesion of your essay, focus on the logical flow of ideas from one paragraph to the next. Each paragraph should transition smoothly to the next. Use a variety of transitional phrases to help link your ideas more effectively. Moreover, each main point should be well-supported with examples or evidence, but remember to link these examples clearly back to the main point they are meant to support. This will help ensure that your essay is not just a collection of ideas, but a coherent argument. Additionally, be careful with the repetition of phrases and overuse of certain words - try to vary your language for better readability.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

264 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Boundaries
Stifle
Decision-making
Relevant
Evolve
Mistakes
Balanced approach
Rebellion
Deceitful
Responsibility
Self-regulation
Exposure
Risks
Guidance
Appropriate limits

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Some people argue that the rapid development of technology is making people's lives more stressful, while others believe it enhances productivity and efficiency. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
The rapid advancement of technology has sparked a contentious debate regarding its impact on individuals' lives and productivity. While some argue that technological developments enhance efficiency, others contend that they contribute to increased stress levels. This essay will explore both perspectives before presenting a reasoned opinion.
7.5
band
Today, many people do not know their neighbors. Why is this? What can be done about this?
In recent years, it has become increasingly common for individuals to be less connected with their immediate neighbours. In my opinion, this is largely a result of a more insular society and can be somewhat alleviated through initiatives that encourage more community interaction.
7.5
band
Nowadays, people are not as fit and healthy as they used to be in the past which creates health issues in the long the run. What are the reasons? What can be done to solve this problem?
Recently, many researchers have stated that the physique of people in general is not as prime as before. This condition also causes them to be prone to sickness in the future. Personally, I believe the advancement of technology and the growth of fast food chains are two essential factors for that to happen. However, it is possible for us to fix this issue by moderating our behaviour and being more active in life.
7
band
Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion
It is thought that with the use of recent technology, society become more intimate towards one another, while others believe that it creates a separation. Although it can be said to be the reason some people are too busy with their own world, I believe that it can be utilized to find another person who has the same interest as us
8
band
Is mental strength important for success in sports or is it more important to have strong and fit people in sports. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some individuals are of the opinion that mentality is significant in sports, while others think physical strength is more crucial to succeed. From this writer’s perspective, I firmly believe that the advantages of mentality could defeat those of a fit body. This essay will expound upon this by giving compelling reasons and practical examples.

Parents and teachers make many rules for children to increase good behaviour and protect them from danger. However, children wood benefit from fever rules and greater freedom. To what extent do. You agree or disagree?

Your opinion

Some people argue that the rapid development of technology is making people's lives more stressful, while others believe it enhances productivity and efficiency. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Today, many people do not know their neighbors. Why is this? What can be done about this?

Nowadays, people are not as fit and healthy as they used to be in the past which creates health issues in the long the run. What are the reasons? What can be done to solve this problem?

Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion

Is mental strength important for success in sports or is it more important to have strong and fit people in sports. Discuss both views and give your opinion.