Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#sports #professionals #money #people #professions

In recent years,

due to

the increased popularity of social media, popular

people

tend to earn a lot.

People

in necessary and important professions earn a lot less than popular sports players, which some

people

think is immoral

while

others agree that they deserve it. I would agree that it is unfair for professions that require hard work. One of the significant reasons why successful sportspeople earn more is

due to

their popularity.

For example

, the most popular game in India is cricket. There are millions of

people

watching

this

game through various modes which in turn brings a significant income to the organization that conducts it so they tend to sponsor the players so that both can benefit. The other reason is that sports players represent their whole country by participating in competitions like the World Cup and the Olympics and bringing laurels to their countries which justifies their enormous earnings.

On the other hand

, Some professionals

such

as doctors and healthcare workers put in so much effort and hard work. They undoubtedly sacrifice their own priorities for the benefit of the patient which is much more essential for social development and security which is the reason why it is unfair for them to receive comparatively lower income than a sports person.

In contrast

, if there are fewer professionals like doctors their country might face a deteriorating economy. In conclusion,

Although

there a significant reasons like popularity and sponsorships which are responsible for the extortionate salary of the sportsperson. It is undeniable that it is unfair to other professionals like doctors who are more important to society and the

people

Submitted by m.keerthanah on Sat Mar 16 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that your essay has a clear, logical structure, with coherent paragraphs each focusing on a specific point. Consider using more linking words and transition phrases to enhance flow between ideas.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction should clearly present both views and your opinion. Make sure your conclusion effectively summarizes the discussion and restates your opinion more decisively. Try to avoid introducing new ideas in the conclusion.

task achievement

Fully address the task by discussing both views comprehensively and providing specific examples to support each. Your personal opinion should be clear and well-supported with reasoned arguments. Consider expanding your argument with more nuanced examples and a deeper analysis of each viewpoint.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

270 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial remuneration
exceptional
merit
talent
demand
entertainment value
career span
physical demands
justified
unfair
criticism
income inequality
societal priorities
sportsmanship

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Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Despite a variety of sport facilities and gyms, people are less fit nowadays than ever before. What do you think are the main causes of this problem? What solutions can you suggest?

Employers should give their staff at least four-weeks’ holiday a year to help employees get better at their jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think travelling abroad is a valuable experience for young people. Others think it wastes too much time and money. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some areas of the US, a curfew is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion about this?

In some countries, even though the rates of serious crimes are decreasing, people feel less safe than ever before. What do you think are the causes of this problem and what measures could be taken to solve it?