IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Nowadays, not enough students choose science subject in university in many countries. What are the reasons of this problem? What are the effects on the society?

#students #science #university #countries #effects #society
In the modern era, a
number
 of global
students
 prefer to choose non-
science
 fields more than
science
 subjects. There are some reasons for
this
 phenomenon and it impacts the future of society.
This
 essay will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
it.
To begin
 with, the perception of
science
 as a difficult field decreases
students
’ interest in learning about it. The existence of perception is because of little exposure to understanding
science
 which becomes difficult to apply in daily life contributes to
students
 choosing another subject. Afterwards, there is limited access to
acquire
Verb problem
apply
show examples
education
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
science
 with good quality. The low quality is represented by insufficient methods, resources, and teachers of
science
 decreasing the opportunity
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
students
 to pursue their studies in a
science
 subject. The
problems
 of rare
students
 in many countries learning subjects related to
science
leading
Wrong verb form
will have
show examples
 a serious effect on society in the future. There is a lack of professionals in
science
 fields because of a low
number
 of graduates with
science
 as a background education. The country
also
 has difficulty
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
tackling the
problems
 and challenges of global and national issues related to
science
,
such
 as climate change,
pandemic
Fix the agreement mistake
pandemics
show examples
, environmental issues and many more. In conclusion, the reasons
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
low
Change the article
a low
the low
show examples
number
 of
science
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 because the idea of heavy learning about
science
 subjects and the low quality of
science
 education represented by there are limited resources, methods and teachers in
science
 fields.
This
 phenomenon leads to
problems
 in the future,
such
 as a low
number
 of
science
 professionals and many
problems
 related to
science
,
cush
Correct your spelling
such
show examples
 as climate change,
pandemic
Fix the agreement mistake
pandemics
show examples
 and many more that are hard to tackle by countries.
Submitted by writingieltsband9 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
To improve Task Response, ensure that your essay directly addresses all parts of the task. Add specific examples and details to support your ideas more clearly and convincingly. Consider including statistics, studies, or real-world examples to solidify your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
For better Coherence and Cohesion, focus on improving the flow of ideas between paragraphs. Use a wider variety of linking words and phrases to show the relationship between ideas more clearly. Additionally, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, supported by examples or explanations.
Overall
Increase the depth of your analysis to enhance the quality of your essay. Explore the causes and effects in more depth, providing more detailed explanations and examples. This will help to make your argument more persuasive and comprehensive.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: