Some young people look forward to a year of travelling, a 'gap year', before they begin work or university and see it as a chance to broaden their horizons. For others, this is an expensive waste of time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #year #gap #work #university #chance #horizons #waste #time

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People

have different views about whether youngsters should experience travelling for a

year

before going to the

work

environment or starting university.

While

some

people

argue that

this

is a great opportunity for young individuals to taste new things, others find it only a waste of

time

Although

I have some sympathy with the latter view, I believe that a

gap

year

could be highly rewarding in total. Having a

gap

year

positively affects the students only the

year

before their

work

or study, often opening a window to their world. They would be able to build and develop new relationships and make new friends with different beliefs and thoughts.

Similarly

, they can use their new friends' experiences to choose the best option for their career or study.

For example

, for those who have studied science in high school, majors like psychology and art might be unfamiliar.

As a result

, spending

time

with society members studying or those who graduated from different fields can make them meet their hidden interests buried deeply in their subconscious.

Moreover

, it will get more complicated and challenging to change your career as you get older. So, it is recommended to give it your best shot in your youth. For many

people

, students should begin to

work

or continue their grades as soon as their university is finished because it is a waste of

time

and money. It might seem that a

gap

year

without earning money is detrimental, only spending money on a resort.

However

, gaining new experiences and,

therefore

, choosing the best option for future

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

would far compensate for

this

period.

In addition

, some may spend part of their

time

in resorts, but many do voluntary

work

and widen their network, helping them pursue jobs that could fit their character and leading them to approach their dream jobs. In conclusion, the concerns of those individuals about the negatives of taking a trip as a

gap

year

before

work

are understandable, but ultimately, I side with

people

who see

this

as a merit and a huge chance.

Submitted by TUTOO on Mon Mar 18 2024

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Coherence & Cohesion

Ensure a clear and logical structure throughout your essay. This involves having a strong introduction, well-developed body paragraphs, and a clear conclusion. In this essay, the structure is well-defined, but further emphasis on the logical flow between ideas could enhance readability and coherence.

Task Achievement

Include relevant specific examples to support your points. While the essay provides good general discussion on the benefits of a gap year, incorporating more detailed examples (e.g., personal anecdotes, statistical evidence) could strengthen your arguments and make them more convincing.

Task Achievement

Strive for clarity and precision in your ideas. While the essay presents clear arguments, ensuring that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and elaborates on it comprehensively enhances task achievement. Avoid overgeneralization by providing specific insights into how a gap year can benefit individuals in unique ways.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

344 words

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Some young people look forward to a year of travelling, a 'gap year', before they begin work or university and see it as a chance to broaden their horizons. For others, this is an expensive waste of time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Your city is planning to develop new sports complex. The city has sent out an opinion survey to see what residents would like to have built in that area. Athletic tracks and supports Complex: Sports complex will mainly provide facilities to Athletes.

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people, while others believe that the purpose of museums is to educate.Discuss both views and give you own opinion

The education of young people is highly prioritized in many countries. However, educating adults who cannot write or read is even more important, and governments should spend more money on this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people around the world use social media to keep in touch with other people and get the news. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.