Some people think that dancing is an important subject for children at school while others think it is a waste of time.​ What are positive and negative sides of art at school?​ ​Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples ​ from your experience or knowledge. Write about 180-220 words.

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It is often argued that dancing is an essential curriculum for
students
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but some people believe
that
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apply
show examples
that there are a lot of activities which should be taught to children because it is considered a waste of time. In my opinion, dancing has more merits as compared to
drawbacks
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the drawbacks
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they might bring. It is true that dancing helps
in enhancing
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enhance
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the physical health of
students
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as it boosts
the
Change the word
their
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energy
in
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apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
For instance
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,
students
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are sitting in their classrooms for long durations. So arranging
dance
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classes for 30 minutes to unwind their monotonous class schedule and be actively part of physical activity.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it assists in reducing the mental stress of pupils as they are facing
burden
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the burden
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of studies and assignments. They
also
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have sedentary
lifestyle
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lifestyles
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so to break that cycle adding
dance
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class to their schedule is a great idea to help them have a little fun and relax.
However
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, having
dance
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classes is not favoured by a lot of people as it creates
distraction
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a distraction
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for
students
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from their studies. To exemplify, some
students
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only try to find excuses to get rid of
studies
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their studies
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which can affect their academic results.
Secondly
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, It is not suitable for all
students
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because few of them do not like dancing and want to do something different like playing sports and going to the library to study.
Thus
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, schools should have
other kind
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another kind
other kinds
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of
curriculars
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curricular
curricula
available to the
students
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to choose from that
fits
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fit
show examples
best for them. In conclusion,
advantages
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the advantages
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of having
dance
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class
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classes
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in school
has overweighs
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outweigh
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the drawbacks as
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
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refreshes
Correct subject-verb agreement
refresh
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the
students
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from their hectic
schedule
Fix the agreement mistake
schedules
show examples
.
Submitted by harmeetkohli31 on

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task
Start by closely analyzing the prompt to ensure your essay directly responds to all parts. The prompt asks about the positive and negative aspects of art at school, yet your essay primarily focuses on dance, only briefly mentioning other forms of art and activities. Expanding your discussion to cover a range of art forms will improve task response.
structure
Enhance your essay's structure by clearly separating it into paragraphs, each with a unique focus. Your introduction should clearly state your thesis and preview the key points you will discuss. Each body paragraph should start with a topic sentence that introduces the main idea of the paragraph, followed by explanations and examples. A clear conclusion summarizing your argument will also help.
cohesion
Improve coherence by making sure each sentence flows logically to the next. This can be achieved through the use of connecting words and phrases (e.g., furthermore, in contrast, for example) and by maintaining a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion.
example
To strengthen your essay, provide specific examples that illustrate your points. While you mention that dance can help relieve stress and improve physical health, adding real-life examples or citing research could make your arguments more convincing.
style
Consider varying your sentence structure to make your writing more engaging. This includes using a mix of complex and compound sentences, as well as employing passive voice where appropriate.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • extracurricular
  • kinesthetic learning
  • aesthetic appreciation
  • cognitive development
  • resource allocation
  • holistic development
  • academic rigor
  • creative outlets
  • physical endurance
  • budget constraints
  • curriculum integration
  • motor skills
  • self-discipline
  • peer interaction
  • cultural awareness
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