people are spending more on travel today than in the past. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
Voyaging has been prevalent lately, compared to decades or centuries ago.
This
preference might be opted for because of its perks in reducing stress. As we know, today's world is full of hassles, some folks need to find a peaceful place to unwind themselves. However
, going on vacation usually requires a mode of transportation. A considerable amount of commuters can pollute the environment profusely, which has the likelihood to override the benefit itself.
Modern hurdles such
as workers' layoffs, social disparity, and many more are known as the primary stressors for today's generation. To cope with these things, a lot of people tend to escape from their source of distress, which causes travelling as the answer. For instance
, numerous urban are too crowded for its civilians. Having a vacation to the countryside or other countries is fitting their cup of tea to be relieved from the usual life. Therefore
, this
habit has proliferated, and many people began to use their sum to stroll around somewhere else.
On the other hand
, the utilization of vehicles in travelling has a negative influence, which is pollution. To illustrate, the use of aircraft or cars ends up with carbon emissions that are hazardous to the earth's atmosphere. Our ozone layers will be gone if the carbons keep lingering there. If that occurs, humans will be affected directly by sun radiation, and eventually suffer from harsh ailments like cancer. The more commuters there are, the more deterioration is going to happen. We are on the verge of a major hidden crisis, which is a grave issue that should be considered.
In a nutshell, voyaging is fruitful at the individual level, but not at the societal level. Had more folks realized the disruptive effect, many of them would have been dwindling their customs. Judging from the trouble it gives, I do not think creating travelling as a lifestyle is worthwhile. In addition
, I would recommend for youths to be more wise in deciding to travel, especially on the vehicles they are going to use.Submitted by aryasblearning on
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Task Achievement
Expand on the topic by providing a more balanced view on the advantages and disadvantages, including more specific examples to support your arguments. This will help you achieve a more complete task response.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on creating clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader through your argument more effectively. Including transition words between ideas can improve the flow of your essay.
Introduction and Conclusion
While your introduction and conclusion are present, consider strengthening your conclusion by summarizing key points more succinctly and clearly stating your position. This can enhance the clarity and impact of your essay.
Language
Incorporate a wider variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to demonstrate your linguistic range. This can also make your argument more compelling and engaging for the reader.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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