IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In some countries, people are having children at later age in life, what are the reasons? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #people #children #age #life
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Nowadays late pregnancy become prevalent in several nations around the globe.
While
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 a faction of
people
Use synonyms
holds
Correct subject-verb agreement
hold
show examples
 the notion that
this
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 trend
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 ample disadvantages,
other
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others
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 argue that
this
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 trend has more advantages .
This
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 essay will delve into both
veiwpoints
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viewpoints
 and explain my support for the latter argument. First and foremost, one of the obvious reasons for the late
pregancy
Correct your spelling
pregnancy
 is to avoid distraction from
children
Use synonyms
 and focus on their
career
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 development.
In other words
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, the
people
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 having
children
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 should spend sufficient time
to take
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taking
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 care
juveniles
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of juveniles
show examples
 until they become independent,
therefore
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, many
people
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decided
Wrong verb form
decide
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 to have
child
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children
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 after
achieve
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achieving
show examples
 their
career
Use synonyms
 goals.
Besides
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, to raise up a child, arguably,
require
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requires
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 financial stability, in turn, several young couples decided to have
children
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 later
life
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in life
show examples
 after
arn
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earning
 sufficient savings.
Moreover
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, there are many disadvantages to
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 a parent in old age. Medical experts notified that
number
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a number
the number
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 of health complications may
develope
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develop
 to
mother
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mothers
show examples
 and
offsping
Correct your spelling
offspring
 in late
preganancy
Correct your spelling
pregnancy
.
For example
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, statistics
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
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 that
noraml
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normal
 delivery is less common in
old age
Add a hyphen
old-age
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pregnancy
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pregnancies
show examples
.
Moreover
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, childless
people
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 might be isolated from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society and
peer
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peers
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. In detail,
childless
Add an article
the childless
a childless
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family
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families
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 may not
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
fit within the group of
people
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 who have
children
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,
therfore
Correct your spelling
therefore
, they might feel isolated.
Neverthless
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Nevertheless
, In my
prespective
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perspective
, there are several advantages to
be
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
 childless
in
Change preposition
at
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early
Correct article usage
an early
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 age.
People
Use synonyms
 need to pursue their dreams before they
get
Verb problem
have
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children
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. For
examples
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example
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, couples who wish to explore the world
,
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apply
show examples
 can travel without any worries about
children
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.
Similarly
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 can change their
career
Use synonyms
 or country without any
obsticle
Correct your spelling
obstacle
obstacles
.
In contrast
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,
people
Use synonyms
 with kids need to consider schooling of their
offsping
Correct your spelling
offspring
. In conclusion,
career
Use synonyms
 development and lack of financial stability are the obvious reasons for the later pregnancy. Not only medical complications but
also
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 social
isolations
Fix the agreement mistake
isolation
show examples
 are the disadvantages of
this
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 trend. Ergo, I believe that late
pegancy
Correct your spelling
pregnancy
 is helpful for
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 to explore their dreams.
Submitted by ck.manshad on

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coherence cohesion
Be sure to vary your sentence structures to demonstrate a command of complex sentences and enhance clarity. This variety will prevent your writing from seeming repetitive or simplistic.
task achievement
Work on developing a coherent and strong thesis statement in your introduction that clearly addresses the question and outlines your viewpoint. This will guide your reader through your essay and make your argumentation clearer.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your arguments. This can include statistical data, studies, or anecdotal evidence that can convincingly back up your points and add depth to your essay.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your conclusion effectively summarizes your key points and restates your thesis in light of the evidence provided. This will leave your reader with a strong, lasting impression of your argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • deferred parenting
  • career trajectory
  • academic pursuits
  • contraception efficacy
  • societal paradigm shift
  • financial solvency
  • emotional maturity
  • parental responsibility
  • demographic trends
  • fertility rates
  • gestational risks
  • intergenerational communication
What to do next:
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