Many people believe that family has a greater influence on a child’s life and development than other factors like friends, TV, music and so on. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #influence #child’s #life #development #factors #friends #tv #music

Many individuals opine that family has the most impact on adolescents' upbringings

instead

of other elements

such

as television, music, pals and many more. I agree with

this

notion and will discuss my points in upcoming paragraphs. To commence with, basic values can only be inherited by

parents

In other words

, guardians assist their children to know the value of their religion, educational factors and the pathway of their future.

For example

India

is a religious country, there are a total of four religions in

India

, a teens will only come to know their beliefs through their

parents

Thus

, cultural values follow from ancestors.

Further

strengthening the view,

parents

can be a role model for their toddlers. To explain

this

, a child has the ability to learn by observing others.

Therefore

, they can grasp the knowledge of behaviour and how to deal with other human beings

as well as

with animals from their home.

For instance

, a survey conducted by the Educational minister of

India

in 2020 revealed that 90 % of the youngsters in

India

follow the same path as their

parents

did, like, a doctor's child becomes a doctor, a farmer's child becomes a farmer and so on.

Therefore

, children will always want to be like their

parents

. In conclusion,

parents

are the best tutors. They not only provide essential startup knowledge to their offspring but

also

provide cultural and religious importance.

Submitted by harpreet291kaur on Fri Mar 22 2024

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Task Achievement

Your essay provides a strong argument that supports your viewpoint, and your introduction and conclusion are both clear and relevant. To enhance Task Achievement, ensure that every paragraph directly addresses the question's statement and adds depth to your argument. Avoid straying into tangential topics.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay has a logical structure, clear introduction, and conclusion, and your main points are well supported. To further improve Coherence and Cohesion, consider using a wider variety of linking words and phrases to demonstrate the relationships between ideas more explicitly. Also, work on paragraphing to ensure each idea is distinct and contributes to the overall argument.

Word Count

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A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

234 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Developmental psychology
Socialization
Inculcate
Role models
Emotional intelligence
Agents of socialization
Primary caregivers
External influences
Nurture vs. nature
Cognitive growth
Interpersonal skills
Parental guidance
Absentee parents
Genetic predispositions

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Many people believe that family has a greater influence on a child’s life and development than other factors like friends, TV, music and so on. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Word Count

Many people believe that the media plays a crucial role in shaping public opinion. Others argue that individuals have the power to form their own opinions independent of media influence. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that children benefit from the TV and they should spend much time on it, but others support that children should not watch TV. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people believe that the best way of learning about life is by listening to advice of family and friends. Others believe that the best way learning way of learning is through personal experience. What is the best way in you opinion?

Some people think that government should spend money on building new train lines,while others believe that improving public transport is more beneficial.Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Some people like to try new things, for example, places to visit and types of food. Other people prefer to keep doing things they are familiar with. Discuss both these attitudes and give your opinion.