Many people believe that family has a greater influence on a child’s life and development than other factors like friends, TV, music and so on. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #influence #child’s #life #development #factors #friends #tv #music

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Many individuals opine that family has the most impact on adolescents' upbringings

instead

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of other elements

such

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as television, music, pals and many more. I agree with

this

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notion and will discuss my points in upcoming paragraphs. To commence with, basic values can only be inherited by

parents

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In other words

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, guardians assist their children to know the value of their religion, educational factors and the pathway of their future.

For example

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India

Use synonyms

is a religious country, there are a total of four religions in

India

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, a teens will only come to know their beliefs through their

parents

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Thus

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, cultural values follow from ancestors.

Further

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strengthening the view,

parents

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can be a role model for their toddlers. To explain

this

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, a child has the ability to learn by observing others.

Therefore

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, they can grasp the knowledge of behaviour and how to deal with other human beings

as well as

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with animals from their home.

For instance

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, a survey conducted by the Educational minister of

India

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in 2020 revealed that 90 % of the youngsters in

India

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follow the same path as their

parents

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did, like, a doctor's child becomes a doctor, a farmer's child becomes a farmer and so on.

Therefore

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, children will always want to be like their

parents

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. In conclusion,

parents

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are the best tutors. They not only provide essential startup knowledge to their offspring but

also

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provide cultural and religious importance.

Submitted by harpreet291kaur on Fri Mar 22 2024

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Task Achievement

Your essay provides a strong argument that supports your viewpoint, and your introduction and conclusion are both clear and relevant. To enhance Task Achievement, ensure that every paragraph directly addresses the question's statement and adds depth to your argument. Avoid straying into tangential topics.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay has a logical structure, clear introduction, and conclusion, and your main points are well supported. To further improve Coherence and Cohesion, consider using a wider variety of linking words and phrases to demonstrate the relationships between ideas more explicitly. Also, work on paragraphing to ensure each idea is distinct and contributes to the overall argument.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

234 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Developmental psychology
Socialization
Inculcate
Role models
Emotional intelligence
Agents of socialization
Primary caregivers
External influences
Nurture vs. nature
Cognitive growth
Interpersonal skills
Parental guidance
Absentee parents
Genetic predispositions

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Many people believe that family has a greater influence on a child’s life and development than other factors like friends, TV, music and so on. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Word Count

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