IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The charts below show reasons for travel and the main issues for the travelling public in the US in 2009.

The charts below show reasons for travel and the main issues for the travelling public in the US in 2009.
#show #travel
The chart shows the reasons why
people
travel
, and the diagram depicts the main issues
while
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 in the US in 2009. The most significant proportion of
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 is because of business trips, which was 49%. The number of
people
 who
go
Verb problem
apply
show examples
travel
 because of personal reasons and shopping was 19% and 16%, respectively. Both of percentage of
travel
 for visiting friends or relatives and for socializing are less than 15%. 36% of
people
 had problems with
travel
 price issues.
Furthermore
, 19% had problems with safety concerns.
According to
 data, 45% of
people
 had difficulties with transportation. The rate of problems with aggressive drivers and highway congestion accounted for 17% and 14%, respectively.
However
, the problem regarding
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
access to public transport and space for pedestrians
recorded
Add a missing verb
was recorded
show examples
8
Change preposition
at 8
show examples
% and 6% each.
Submitted by heoeunsae on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, travel with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: