some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views give your opinion.

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It is believed that the keys to success are
determination
and hard work,
while
others argue that appearance and
money
are more essential. The author of
this
essay believes that not giving up and being hard-working is vital It is acknowledged that
money
and appearance play crucial roles in some specific fields. In the movie industry,
for instance
, being gorgeous or handsome is a huge benefit as audiences tend to be captivated by good-looking actors/actresses.
As a result
, actors or actresses may leave a good impression and may be advocated by more and more individuals.
Money
is
also
important in starting up a business
This
is because people need a fortune to hire staff, purchase machines, or even rent an office
As a result
, a business can be developed thanks to monetary contribution. It is vital to understand
determination
and hard work play essential roles in every field By working hard, folks can gain different skills
as well as
knowledge, and
determination
helps people to move forward no matter how many times they have failed.
Consequently
, people can move closer to success day by day.
This
author claims that not giving up and being hard-working are the key factors to being successful.
This
is because efforts and being determined are needed not only in the movie industry or sports
in particular
but
also
in other careers generally. In a nutshell, many factors are claimed to be vital to reach success
such
as
money
and appearance or
determination
and hard work. The author thinks that the latter one is more crucial as it is needed in all careers.
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logical structure
To improve your score, ensure your essay has a clear and logical structure. Start with an introduction that presents the topic and your thesis statement. Follow this with body paragraphs, each focusing on a specific point supporting your argument, and conclude by summarizing your points and restating your opinion.
introduction conclusion present
Make sure your essay includes a distinct introduction and conclusion. The introduction should clearly present the essay topic and your stance, while the conclusion should summarize the main points discussed and firmly restate your view.
supported main points
Support your main points with specific examples and explanations. This will make your argument stronger and more convincing. Avoid vague statements by providing clear and relevant examples that directly support your argument.
complete response
Fully address all parts of the task. Make sure you discuss both views and clearly state your own opinion. Provide a balanced discussion before presenting your standpoint.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure your ideas are clearly presented and easy to understand. Organize your essay in a way that each paragraph focuses on a single idea, supported by examples or explanations. Use connective words to improve the flow of information.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate relevant examples that directly support your arguments. Using specific and relevant examples will make your essay more convincing and demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • perseverance
  • discipline
  • resilience
  • effort
  • tenacity
  • external factors
  • financial resources
  • favorable appearance
  • perceptions
  • advantages
  • intrinsic
  • extrinsic
  • sustainable
  • facilitating
  • undeniable
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