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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below. Make comparisons where relevant.

The table below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below. Make comparisons where relevant.
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The table provides general information and
statistic
Fix the agreement mistake
statistics
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 about
metro
Use synonyms
 systems in London, Paris, Tokyo, Washington DC, Kyoto and Los Angeles.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident from the data that the most used railway system is located in Tokyo.
Also
Linking Words
, the size of
route
Add an article
the route
show examples
have
Change the verb form
has
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 a positive correlation with
an
Correct article usage
apply
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age, with a small exception for Kyoto and Los Angeles. It is interesting to note that, the
metro
Use synonyms
 in Tokyo is the third by size,
however
Linking Words
 has the biggest flow of passengers, the number of commuters is bigger than in the London
metro
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
with
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 approximately 1200 million users.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
another
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
Japan's
Change noun form
Japan
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metro
Use synonyms
 system has
a
Change the article
the
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 lowest number of passengers per year,
additionaly
Correct your spelling
additionally
, the route is shorter than
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the newer Los Angeles underground by 17
kilometers
Change the spelling
kilometres
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. It is noticeable that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the railway system in Washington DC has
relatively
Add an article
a relatively
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 small number of users for
such
Linking Words
distance
Correct article usage
a distance
show examples
. The
nearest by size
Add a hyphen
nearest-by-size
show examples
metro
Use synonyms
sytem
Correct your spelling
system
 has a 10 times bigger passenger flow.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words metro with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • underground railway
  • kilometers of route
  • passengers per year
  • extensive network
  • age of the system
  • analyze
  • correlation
  • outliers
  • notable comparisons
  • trends
  • commuter volume
  • inauguration date
  • modernization
  • historic
  • capacity
  • infrastructure
  • operate
  • transportation hub
  • utilization
  • frequency of service
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