Many people believe that it is easier to have a healthy lifestyle in the countryside. Others believe that there are health benefits of living in the cities. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
There are conflicting views about whether living in urban
areas
or rural areas
contributes more to a persons'
Change noun form
person's
abilities
to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Fix the agreement mistake
ability
While
some people argue that cities offer numerous exercising
opportunities and healthy Replace the word
exercise
diet
choices, others advocate for the benefits of living in the countryside, where the air is clean and nature is abundant. This
essay will discuss both these points of view and argue in favor
of the former.
On the one hand, some individuals claim that living in urban settings provides people with a plethora of Change the spelling
favour
exercising
opportunities and varied healthy Wrong verb form
exercise
diet
options. To be clear, most of the cities are equipped with different exercising
facilities, fitness Replace the word
exercise
centers
, parks, and cycling paths, helping urban residents stay active and fit. Change the spelling
centres
Additionally
, participating in sports groups and fitness classes can boost individuals' motivations
to follow healthy routines. Fix the agreement mistake
motivation
Furthermore
, in urban areas
, there are different organic stores and health-oriented restaurants, so people have more access to have
a healthy Unnecessary verb
apply
diet
.
On the other hand
, supporters of living in the countryside believe that living in rural areas
is more
healthier than in cities, Change the word
apply
due to
fresh air and proximity to nature. In other words
, rural areas
are less polluted, helping individuals breathe clean air and protecting them from diverse diseases,
like Remove the comma
apply
hung
cancer and blood pressure. Correct your spelling
lung
Also
, rural dwellers have an opportunity to nourish with
healthy ingredients Correct pronoun usage
themselves with
such
as grains, rice, fruit, and vegetables without any additives, which can reduce the possibility of getting ill.
To conclude
, despite the fact that living in the countryside has a lot of valid advantages for humans, I firmly argue that city settings offer more amenities such
as several gyms and oriented-restaurants
for exercising and following a healthy Correct your spelling
oriented restaurants
diet
would be a better choice to have a healthy lifestyle.Submitted by Pegahghaderi85 on
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Coherence & Cohesion
To improve your score, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and that the transition between paragraphs is smooth. This helps enhance the overall logical structure.
Coherence & Cohesion
While you have done well in introducing and concluding your essay, try to add a sentence summarizing your main points in the conclusion for a more powerful impact.
Task Achievement
Support your points with more specific examples or personal anecdotes. This adds depth to your essay and makes your arguments more convincing.
Task Achievement
Consider exploring the perspectives with more balance. Although you have discussed both views, ensuring equal depth and consideration can enhance the comprehensiveness of your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
