Some people thing that the best way to succeed is to get a university education, while others disagree and say that it is no longer true nowadays. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

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University
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education
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is
enormous
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enormously
show examples
popular and common
all
Change preposition
in all
show examples
parts of the world.
Therefore
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, some
people
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believe that studying at
university
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is an achievement
way
Use synonyms
to accomplish in life.
However
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, some argue that
Use synonyms
university
Correct article usage
a university
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education
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is not
chosen
Correct article usage
the chosen
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way
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to
get
Verb problem
be
show examples
successful today. In my opinion,
education
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at
university
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is extremely useful for
people
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to create a good lifestyle in their entire life.
To begin
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with, why
people
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feel that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
studying at
university
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is the best
way
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to live successfully in the world is that it gives them helpful
method
Fix the agreement mistake
methods
show examples
and
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
show examples
which use in their careers.
In other words
Linking Words
, when
individuals
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graduate from
university
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, they
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
manage their processes in any situation.
For example
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, in 2003, Apply company
obtained
Verb problem
became
show examples
the best company
aware
Correct word choice
apply
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in the USA.
This
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is because it only hires employees who graduated from
university
Use synonyms
. It puts
this
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rule that they can solve a problem with themselves.
Consequently
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, its workers
leaded
Correct your spelling
led
show examples
to get the amazing prize.
On the other hand
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, the main cause of
people
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thinking
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
education
Use synonyms
university
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is not
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
correct
way
Use synonyms
to achieve
succeed
Replace the word
success
show examples
is that there are so many alternatives and quick ways for it
such
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as special courses and beginning to work early. As a matter of fact
that
Correct determiner usage
the
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German government encourages young citizens to attend occupational schools to improve their practical skills rather than learn theory knowledge at
university
Use synonyms
.
Hence
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, The German government found in a statistic,
most
Correct pronoun usage
that most
show examples
students who participated
private
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in private
show examples
colleges could
achieved
Change the verb form
achieve
show examples
in their careers.
Consequently
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, the German government decided to continue
this
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method in
this
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country. Personally, I believe that
education
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Use synonyms
university
Change preposition
at university
show examples
is
prominent
Correct article usage
a prominent
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benefit impact to
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individuals
Fix the agreement mistake
individual
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for getting accomplishments. In fact, focusing on other ways to success achievement is not
experienced
Correct article usage
an experienced
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method in most
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
show examples
of the world.
Nevertheless
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, system
education
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at
university
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has
Add an article
a favorable
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favorable
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favourable
show examples
experiment
Fix the agreement mistake
experiments
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to get accomplishment. Indeed,
Irish
Correct article usage
the Irish
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are
most
Correct article usage
the most
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successfully
Change the word
successful
show examples
people
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compare
Wrong verb form
compared
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to other locals.
This
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is
due to
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the fact that
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
of
individuals
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in Ireland have graduated from
university
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and found
a good jobs
Correct the article-noun agreement
a good job
good jobs
show examples
. In conclusion,
university
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education
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is a helpful
way
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for
individuals
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to achieve something in their life or it is not useful for them is a controversial topic.
Reasons
Correct article usage
The reasons
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mentioned above
supports
Correct subject-verb agreement
support
show examples
studying at
university
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is
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
a beneficial
way
Use synonyms
to prepare
an
Change preposition
for an
show examples
accomplishment
Replace the word
accomplished
show examples
lifestyle.

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Language
Consider using a variety of complex sentence structures to convey your points more effectively.
Accuracy
Pay close attention to grammatical accuracy and spelling to enhance your argument's clarity.
Development
Make sure to elaborate on your examples with specific details to strengthen your argument.
Structure
You have provided a clear, well-structured introduction and conclusion that effectively frame your essay.
Content Depth
Your essay discusses a broad range of ideas, demonstrating your ability to explore complex issues.
Task Response
You effectively used a discussion of both viewpoints, followed by a clear statement of your own perspective, demonstrating strong task achievement.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • university education
  • higher pay
  • sweated and sacrificed
  • higher education
  • time, effort, and financial investment
  • specialized knowledge and skills
  • job prospects
  • economic contributions
  • valuable contributions
  • fairness and equality
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