Some people think that art lessons such as paintings and drawing lessons should be compulsory in secondary schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Integrating
art
subjects
must be mandatory in the school curriculum
which is considered by some flux of people
and I largely agree with this
statement because these lessons lessen stress as well as
can unearth hidden talents which bring them towards career development.
To commence with, people
who are opposite of above-given view consider that these subjects
might consume student's precious time which should be applied on other important subjects
such
as mathematics and science. To explain it, if children are given time for painting and drawing subjects
which get their attention more than another syllabus then
they will not be able to concentrate on science subjects
due to
a lack of interest in these challenging curriculum
, Fix the agreement mistake
curricula
thus
, they would not opt other career paths except art
subjects
.
Shifting towards the view of agreement, implementing art
lessons not only decreases student's stress but also
sharpen
their thinking skills. To elaborate , today's younger receive a lot of work from their mathematics and other Correct subject-verb agreement
sharpens
curriculum
instructors which leads them towards depression, therefore
, if these subjects
are applied in pupil's school curriculum
then
they will divert their attention towards fun activities and it will assist them to reduce some burden from their mind. For instance
, a survey conducted by Harward University in 2016 found that some schools added art
subjects
and students are more excited than before as they enjoy painting and drawing along with
challenging subjects
.
Furthermore
, these essential subjects
are also
a fact of a successful life as some students show their hidden talents by painting and earn a lot of money by choosing this
career. For example
, a headline shown in an international newspaper that in India 55% of people
who are disabled draw paintings and earn money for their families, consequently
, these subjects
become a source of poor and disabled people
's income.
In conclusion, applying some interesting syllabus
in the school Fix the agreement mistake
syllabi
curriculum
not only mitigates children's stress but also
assists in earning money by showing their hidden talents with the help of painting and drawing.Submitted by maninderdeep on
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General
Your essay provides a well-balanced argument that discusses both sides of the topic effectively. It is clear you understand the importance of covering different viewpoints, which bolsters the strength of your own opinion.
Introduction & Conclusion
Your introduction successfully sets up the topic and your stance on it, clearly stating that you agree with making art lessons mandatory. This helps orient the reader immediately.
Structure & Organization
You have organized your essay logically, with clear paragraphs that each address a distinct point. This structure aids the reader's understanding and keeps your argument coherent.
Supporting Examples
You use relevant examples to support your viewpoints, such as the survey conducted by Harvard University and the case of disabled individuals in India benefiting from art. These examples make your argument more convincing.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.