Some people say that governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems to help people prevent illness and disease. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Indeed, It is irrefutable that
due to
advancements in all spheres of life and overpopulation, the major issues faced by the folks are excessive pollution and housing
problems
which
leads
Correct subject-verb agreement
lead
show examples
to
spread
Correct article usage
the spread
show examples
of various
diseases
. So, many individuals argue that the authorities should focus on reducing these troubles. I
also
think that the government should focus on the measures to tackle
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
these
problems
. To Commence with, contamination of the ecological system is causing serious
health
hazards to the human race. It contributes significantly to respiratory
diseases
, heart conditions and cancer.
For example
; more than 50% population in the World is struggling with lung
diseases
like Asthma.
Besides
that, pollution through
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fossil fuels,
increasing
Wrong verb form
increases
show examples
the amount of
Carbondioxide
Correct your spelling
carbon dioxide
in the air which leads to
depletion
Correct article usage
the depletion
show examples
of the Ozone layer.
Consequently
, the Sun rays can reach
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the Earth and can cause Skin cancer.
For instance
; in
Australia
Add a comma
Australia,
show examples
approximately 40% of
populace
Correct article usage
the populace
show examples
 
Add a missing verb
is diagnosted
show examples
diagnosted
Correct your spelling
diagnosed
 with skin
problems
.
Thus
, reducing the pollution would
therefore
directly lower the incidence of these illnesses.
Besides
that, decreasing the use of fossil fuels can
also
help
addressing
Wrong verb form
address
show examples
environmental issues to combat climate related
health
problems
.
Furthermore
,
due to
the overcrowded
cities
Add a comma
cities,
show examples
people face more
infections
Replace the word
infectious
show examples
diseases
because there are more than
desired
Change the article
the desired
show examples
number of people living in one room and home.
This
is happening because the number of constructed houses is less and these are not affordable, which
force
Correct subject-verb agreement
forces
show examples
people to live in small houses.
Besides
that, poor housing conditions are
also
associated with increased stress and
long- term
Correct your spelling
long-term
show examples
health
problems
.
Therefore
, safe and affordable housing is crucial for mental and physical
health
.
To conclude
, the authorities should focus on environmental and housing issues,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
can be more cost-effective in
long
Correct article usage
the long
show examples
term as compared to treating
diseases
after they have developed.
Submitted by bawanpreet070 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • respiratory diseases
  • heart conditions
  • incidence
  • affordable housing
  • stress
  • infectious diseases
  • preventative measures
  • cost-effective
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • comprehensive approach
  • global warming
  • climate change
  • exacerbated
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