It is important for everyone, including young people, yo save money for their future.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Money

Use synonyms

management has been considered a crucial skill among

people

Use synonyms

around the world. Some believe that saving

money

Use synonyms

for the future is not as important as happiness derived from spending

money

Use synonyms

on their interests,

while

Linking Words

many

people

Use synonyms

argue that saving

money

Use synonyms

is important for well-being in old age. In my opinion, I agree with the latter view, and the reasons supporting my perspective will be discussed in the following paragraphs. Nowadays, younger

generations

Use synonyms

, my generation, place less emphasis on

money

Use synonyms

than older

generations

Use synonyms

. Younger

generations

Use synonyms

tend to buy newly advertised items online,

such

Linking Words

as on social media, or offline.

For instance

Linking Words

, many students often buy new pouches solely because of their beauty or because other

people

Use synonyms

in their class have them. Even if they have a usable one, they tend to buy a new one to satisfy their needs or others, without awareness of its importance to their lives.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, older

people

Use synonyms

and some younger

generations

Use synonyms

believe that saving

money

Use synonyms

is still important because it can guarantee a quality of life as they age. It is undeniable that adults have many responsibilities.

For example

Linking Words

, elderly

people

Use synonyms

often have health problems that require a lot of

money

Use synonyms

for high-quality treatment.

Moreover

Linking Words

aging

Change the spelling

ageing

show examples

bodies may prevent

people

Use synonyms

from working

due to

Linking Words

limited abilities, meaning they will have less or no income. In my opinion, saving

money

Use synonyms

is a crucial skill that all

generations

Use synonyms

must pay attention to in order to live happily. Poor financial status in old age can cause mental health issues

such

Linking Words

as anxiety or depression, which can lead to many physical health problems. In conclusion, saving

money

Use synonyms

is very important not only for younger

generations

Use synonyms

but for everyone. Raising awareness and encouraging

people

Use synonyms

to save

money

Use synonyms

are

Change the verb form

show examples

crucial for a better society.

narnrs1Sat Oct 12 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

To enhance task achievement, aim to provide a more in-depth exploration of both viewpoints and offer more balanced examples, ensuring each point is thoroughly developed.

coherence and cohesion

Improve coherence and cohesion by ensuring a smooth transition between points, using a variety of linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your essay.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussed viewpoints.

task achievement

Relevant examples are provided to illustrate key points, particularly the comparison between younger and older generations.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Many businesses think that the new employees who have just graduated from schools lack interpersonal skills, such as working with colleagues as a team. What has caused this and what are the solutions to this problem?
Online sites have made it easy for the public to access information without the need to buy physical products like newspapers and books at no additional cost. Although I agree with this statement to some extent many factors should be taken into consideration as well.
7.5
band
In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?
The extremely high cost of property in some parts of the world still cannot prevent most people from buying accommodation instead of renting one. In my opinion, the main reasons that drive this decision are financial security and the feeling of control that owning a home provides.
7
band
Differences between countries are becoming less evident. Nowadays people are watching the same films, fashion, brands, advertisements and TV channels. To what extent do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advantages?
Today, It can be seen that social media has developed very fast and commonly, so many individuals can follow the same movies, censures, advertisements, and TV channels. Although many point out that the characteristics of countries are becoming less obvious. The writer of this essay will consider the pros and cons to give my opinion that will support the advantages that the popularity of multinational films, commercials, and television channels has brought many benefits such as increasing cultural exchanges, expanding knowledge, and providing diverse entertainment experiences for everyone than lacking reflection of reality and cultural diversity.
6
band
You are going to organise a family party next week at your home. You want to invite a friend to this party. Write a letter to your friend inviting him/her to attend the party. In your letter, • explain why you are organising the party • describe what you are planning to do • say why you want your friend to come to the party
I hope you are doing well! I am exited to let you know that I am having a family party at my home next week and I would love for you to come.
6.5
band
Some people think climate change has a negative impact on business, while others think that it provides more business option. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
A controversial argument has arisen between two views, the first one believes that it holds various merits, while the other one disagrees with that. In this report, I will go through both sides of this conflict, and then allow me to conclude my point of view.

It is important for everyone, including young people, yo save money for their future.

Your opinion

Many businesses think that the new employees who have just graduated from schools lack interpersonal skills, such as working with colleagues as a team. What has caused this and what are the solutions to this problem?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Differences between countries are becoming less evident. Nowadays people are watching the same films, fashion, brands, advertisements and TV channels. To what extent do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advantages?

Some people think climate change has a negative impact on business, while others think that it provides more business option. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.