IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The diagram below shows the recycling process of aluminium cans. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

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The diagram explains the way in which
aluminium
Use synonyms
 can be recycled .
Overall
Linking Words
,what stands out from the picture is that the recycling process of
aluminium
Use synonyms
cans
Use synonyms
 is a cyclical process that consists of several main stages,including use,collection,cleaning,sorting,shredding,compressing,heating and melting,rolling,recycling and reusing. In the first stage,after
aluminium
Use synonyms
cans
Use synonyms
 are used by consumers,they are discarded in recycling bins that are for
aluminium
Use synonyms
cans
Use synonyms
 only,waiting for trucks to transport them to the recycling centre .Once there,through the use of
spevial
Correct your spelling
special
 machines,
cans
Use synonyms
 are cleaned to remove any residue after which they are sorted and those that can be reused are shredded and compressed . Once the compressing step is over,these
cans
Use synonyms
 undergo the melting stage,where they are heated to high temperatures.To subsequent
this
Linking Words
 step,melted
cans
Use synonyms
 are rolled and their thickness varies between 2.5 mm and 6 mm.
Finally
Linking Words
,they are recycled and three-quarters of all
cans
Use synonyms
 become available for customers.After they are reused,they go through the recycling process all over again.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words aluminium, cans with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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