These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
In today's digital area, mobile
phones
and the internet
play a crucial role in shaping social interactions. While
these technologies bring certain drawbacks like dependency and addiction, this
essay agrees that the benefits that they offer such
as instant communication
and connectivity across distances outweigh the disadvantages because they improve communication
in personal lives and business.
To begin
with, mobile phones
and the internet
have completely changed the way people
communicate, allowing individuals to stay connected regardless of geographical barriers. Social networking platforms and messaging apps enable instant communication
, fostering stronger relationships among friends and family members. Furthermore
, modern technologies have transformed the way businesses operate and people
work. With the rise of remote work, individuals have greater flexibility in managing their personal and professional lives. As a result
, this
flexibility promotes work-life balance and allows people
to pursue their passions or spend more time with their loved ones. For example
, that makes it easier for a single parent to take care of their children and do a full-time job.
However
, there is a major concern that excessive use of mobile phones
and the internet
might lead to dependency and addiction, detracting from real-life social interactions and relationships. Some may prioritize virtual connections over face-to-face communication
, leading to feelings of disconnection and loneliness, and a decline in mental well-being, especially among younger generations. For instance
, in Japan, there are a lot of young people
who live online only and hardly ever go outside, which leads to many mental issues, and an increased amount of suicide attempts in their age group.
In conclusion, the impact of mobile phones
and the internet
on social relationships is multifaceted, with both advantages and disadvantages. Nevertheless
, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages because the technologies simplify the way people
interact with each other.Submitted by natallia.khrenava on
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task achievement
Ensure that your essay maintains a balance between advantages and disadvantages before concluding that one outweighs the other. Expanding on each side can provide a more comprehensive argument.
coherence cohesion
Try to use a wider range of cohesive devices to link your ideas more naturally. This will make your essay flow better and improve its readability.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples to support your arguments. While the examples provided are relevant, adding more detailed scenarios or statistics can make your argument stronger.
task achievement
You've done well in maintaining a clear position throughout the essay, demonstrating that the advantages of mobile phones and the internet in social relationships outweigh the disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are coherent and effectively frame your essay, making your argument clear from the beginning to the end.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...