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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Today’s fresh food like vegetables or fruits travels thousands of miles from the rural areas or farms before it reaches customers in cities or urban areas. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative trend?

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Nowadays, fresh produce
such
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 as
vegetables
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 and
fruits
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 are frequently transported over vast distances from rural areas to urban centres before reaching consumers.
This
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 practice remains a subject of debate. In
this
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 essay, I will delineate several rationales behind
this
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 phenomenon and provide my perspective. Primarily, rural areas offer optimal
conditions
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 for cultivating
vegetables
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 and
fruits
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, boasting ample open land and favourable natural environments.
Additionally
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, certain regions specialize in crop cultivation, benefiting from specific climatic
conditions
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 conducive to large-scale fruit agriculture.
For instance
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, locales like Da Lat and Sapa are renowned for strawberries and cherries,
while
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 hot regions excel in watermelon and durian production.
Conversely
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, urban cultivation faces challenges
due to
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 high construction density and air pollution resulting from significant CO2 emissions from various activities like
transportation
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 and manufacturing.
Although
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 techniques
such
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 as vertical farming have been adopted in some urban settings, their output remains insufficient to meet market demands. Transporting fresh produce over thousands of miles from rural farms to urban markets presents challenges in maintaining product quality, particularly in adverse weather
conditions
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 or on rough terrain. Vibrations during
transportation
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 can lead to bruising of
vegetables
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,
while
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 delays may cause spoilage or contamination of
fruits
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.
Nonetheless
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, to ensure adequate quantities and high-quality products,
this
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transportation
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 trend must persist. Integration of freezing equipment in transport vehicles can effectively preserve freshness and minimize adverse effects during transit. In conclusion,
while
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 long-distance
transportation
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 of fresh produce entails challenges
such
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 as weather and road
conditions
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, it remains the most viable means for urban consumers to access quality
vegetables
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 and
fruits
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. The fertile soil, clean air, and expansive agricultural lands available in rural areas support
this
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 practice, making it indispensable for meeting urban dietary needs.

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coherence cohesion
For enhancing your essay, consider varying the sentence structures more and utilizing a range of linking words to improve the flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Emphasize balancing the discussion by including more specific examples and insights into both the positive and negative aspects of the trend to enrich your argument and present a more nuanced evaluation.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay effectively introduces the topic and presents a clear stance, which is well-supported throughout.
relevant specific examples
You utilized relevant examples to support your points, effectively illustrating the reasons for the transportation of fresh produce.
logical structure
The structure of your essay follows a logical order, facilitating an understandable and coherent reading experience.
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