In some countries, online shopping is replacing shopping in stores. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Recently,many

people

in several countries have preferred online shopping over shopping in

stores

. It is obvious that the presence of technology facilitates daily tasks, including online shopping. I firmly believe that online shopping is a clear

example

of a beneficial development.

This

essay will demonstrate the positive aspects of shopping online

instead

of in

stores

Firstly

, online shopping is considered a time-saving option for many

people

, especially workers. To illustrate,

instead

of going shopping in

stores

after work and waiting in long lines for hours, they can shop online and obtain all their needs via click in a few minutes with faster delivery.

For

example

, stuff from the supermarket and pharmacy,

in addition

to ordering foods during break hours,

such

as lunch

Change the punctuation

show examples

Secondly

, easy access to the websites or applications of many local and international brands since they are available on different electronic devices

such

as mobile phones, iPads,and laptops;

therefore

people

can shop in worldwide countries in an easy way from their homes or offices.

For

example

, OUNASS is a luxury shopping application that contains many international brands and provides fast delivery of shipments within two days to one week, a maximum.

Additionally

,some brands provide exclusive discounts for users shopping online.

For

example

, Zara, a popular clothing brand, provides a ten

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

discount for first-time online purchases.

Moreover

, customers can follow their

favorite

Change the spelling

favourite

show examples

brand and be updated by receiving emails containing pictures of new collections and dates of seasonal offers.

To sum up

,many

people

enjoy online shopping and describe it as an interesting experience, and it has advantages over shopping in

stores

such

as saving time and effort

in addition

to providing customers with special offers.

Submitted by jumanh114 on Fri Apr 05 2024

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accuracy

Remember to proofread your essay for minor grammatical errors and typos, as they can distract from your ideas.

task response

Try to balance both sides of the argument, even when clearly favoring one, to fully address the prompt.

coherence cohesion

Vary your sentence structures to demonstrate a range of grammatical forms and to keep the reader engaged.

task response

Consider elaborating on potential drawbacks of online shopping as well, to present a more nuanced argument.

task achievement

Effective use of supporting examples to strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Clear, logical structure that guides the reader through your points effectively.

coherence cohesion

Effective introduction and conclusion that frame your essay's argument.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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