Many countries spend a lot of money on art. Some people think investment in art is necessary, but others say the money is better spent on improving health and education. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
ome say that spending lots of money on art is important,
while
others also
say that many countries should focus on health and education development. This
essay will describe both views of these thoughts and how those are essential for the capitals.
It is thought that many countries investing much money in the art sector is crucial , which may significantly affect a part of well-being improvement and tourism. For instance
, In Italy and Paris, there are a plethora of creative activities established such
as lots of museums in Paris. As a consequence
, those creative art are appealing to tourists across the world as well as
remarkably increasing the amount of income in that section. Moreover
, this
part also
contributes to economic growth and capita income.
Conversely
, some people think that the investment in health and education is much better. It is obvious that those improvements are fundamental to the well-being of their populations. There are free campaigns of public schools and hospitals for the citizens which are organized by the government. For example
, studying at a university in Germany is free for citizens. Furthermore
, when people are less concerned about the amount of spending on school fees and medical expenses. They could be more pleased enjoying their lives, which most people prefer work-life balance.
To conclude
, I personally think that health and education are fundamental structures of each country. Those are supposed to be crucial parts of national development. In addition
, any profession could be capable of supporting economic growth.Submitted by phanphetpor on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Task Achievement
Ensure a clear and concise thesis statement in your introduction to guide the reader through your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Be cautious with spelling and minor grammatical errors, as they can disrupt the flow of your essay. For example, 'ome' should be 'Some', and pay attention to proper usage of spaces around punctuation.
Task Achievement
Develop your ideas further by providing more detailed examples and explanations. While you've touched on important points, deeper analysis can strengthen your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Try to use a variety of sentence structures and transitional phrases to improve the flow of your writing and keep the reader engaged.
Task Achievement
You successfully discussed both views on the topic, providing a balanced analysis.
Task Achievement
You included specific examples, such as the focus on art in Italy and Paris, which helped to support your arguments.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarized your opinion based on the discussions presented, clearly stating your stance on the topic.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?