Modern technology, such as personal computers and the Internet, have made it possible for many people to do their work from home at least part of the time instead of going to an office every day. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of this situation? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Since the digital era was invented by engineers, employees have had the opportunity to work from home. Many folks believe that performing tasks from their flats saves
time
and reduces environmental pollution problems. Both sides of this
essay will be carefully analysed before constructing an inference and at the end
, I will share my experience.
On the one hand, the main reason is that travelling to the office takes time
, if staff work from home they can utilise that period of time
for other household tasks. Another factor is that it reduces pollution such
as sound and environmental, because folks are driving to their workplaces. Furthermore
, less accident happens. For example
, in 2020 due to
COVID-19, employees got more time
to stay with their family members. As a result
, it is evident that less pressure on public infrastructures.
On the other hand
, the primary reason for working from their flats is people feel isolated due to
being unable to reach their mates and missing face-to-face meetings, where they cannot update their knowledge. Another factor is that humans get involved in family violence due to
staying the whole day at the house. Moreover
, they suffer from anxiety and obesity due to
the lack of exercise and movement. For instance
, in a survey done by the New South Wales Authorities, they found people who worked from home 30% suffered from family violence, obesity and anxiety. As a consequence
, it is apparent community want to physically attend office environments.
In my experience, in 2021 covid time
, I stayed with my family after a long busy time
. It was a great experience to understand each other for 24 hours stay together and develop love and affection with each other.
In conclusion, following the analysis of both sides, it is clear that
working from their units saves time
and money, however
, workers miss opportunities to update their skills and forthcoming inventions. Families should support each other in this
situation.Submitted by rbtech65 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Your essay effectively covers both the advantages and disadvantages of working from home, and it includes a personal example. However, consider providing more concrete examples and data to support your points more robustly. This will make your argument more compelling.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is logically structured, some transitions between ideas can be smoother. Ensure that each paragraph flows naturally into the next. Utilise linking words like 'therefore', 'consequently', and 'moreover' to connect your ideas seamlessly.
coherence cohesion
Try to avoid repetitive phrases and sentences to maintain a varied and engaging prose. For example, 'On the one hand' and 'on the other hand' are useful but can become repetitive if overused.
coherence cohesion
Some minor grammatical mistakes were noted, such as 'less accident happens' (should be 'fewer accidents happen') and 'folks are driving to their workplaces' (could be 'when folks drive to their workplaces'). Proofread your work or use grammar checking tools for a cleaner submission.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction is strong, setting a clear context for the discussion. The conclusion effectively summarises the main points and offers a balanced view.
relevant specific examples
The essay provides relevant examples, such as the COVID-19 pandemic and the survey conducted by New South Wales Authorities. These examples enhance the credibility of your arguments.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your personal experience shared towards the end adds a human touch to your essay, making it more relatable and engaging.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!