Advertising is becoming more and more common in everyday life. Some people say that advertising has a positive impact on our lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Commercials are becoming usual in our everyday lives. A group of citizens think advertising has a beneficial effect on our daily lives. I do not believe in
this
argument because they are becoming more annoying rather than effective.
To begin
with, if a company wants to inform the community about the latest product they usually use advertising,
although
,
this
space has been captured by massive and wealthy companies.
As a result
, if a new business wants to start its career they have to spend a huge amount of money to be noticed in the media.
For example
, if people focus on ads they will find that all of them mention repetitive contexts
such
as Coca-Cola,Nike,and Apple.
Therefore
, they narrowed the way for others.
Additionally
,
this
system has lost its reliability because during these years the number of products mentioned by advertisements that had bad reputations increased dramatically.
For instance
, the zero-kola at first mentioned as a drink without any drawbacks,
however
,
last
studies indicated
this
drink might trigger cancer in the human body.
On the other hand
, some believe advertisement is positive because we can find out about the most popular materials and the most modern technology.
Nonetheless
, I think in
this
developed world we can seek on the internet and find users' ideas about equipment and ingredients it is useless to follow companies that aim to control your needs and persuade you to buy them without considering the disadvantages. In conclusion, media and all other display technology have been captured by advertising. In my opinion, is a complete waste of time to follow them because they are inaccurate and they have lost their reliability so it is better to seek information from buyers on social media and find their real feedback.
Submitted by soroushnorouzi0478 on

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Specific Examples
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Vocabulary and Sentence Structure
Work on varying your sentence structures and vocabulary to avoid repetitiveness and to enhance the readability and engagement of your essay. This will also help in expressing your ideas more effectively.
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Consider both sides of the argument more thoroughly. While you did address the counterargument, increasing the depth and consideration of opposing views could provide a more balanced and nuanced perspective.
Introduction and Position
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Essay Structure
Your essay’s overall structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, positively contributes to its coherence and cohesion.
Use of Examples
Using clear examples such as Coca-Cola, Nike, and Apple, and discussing their influence, serves well to support your arguments and makes your writing more persuasive.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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