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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Parents often give children everything they ask for and do what they like. Is it good for children? What are the consequences when they grow up?

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Indulging
children
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 has become a prevalent parenting issue in many modern families. From my perspective,
this
Linking Words
 practice may have both immediate adverse impacts and long-term consequences for
children
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. In the short term, overindulgence can have immediate adverse impacts on
children
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's acquisition of crucial life
skills
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. There
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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many evidences
Fix the agreement mistake
much evidence
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 across various age groups, from toddlers to teenagers.
For instance
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, many
parents
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 excessively cater to their
children
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's needs,
such
Linking Words
 as spoon-feeding them until they are five or six years old, a stage at which they should be capable of eating independently.
Similarly
Linking Words
, it's common in our culture for
parents
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 to assist preadolescent
children
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 with bathing, which may hinder the development of basic personal hygiene
skills
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 at the appropriate age. Looking ahead, over-indulged
children
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 may face even more significant challenges as they grow into adulthood. When
parents
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 consistently
fulfill
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fulfil
show examples
 all their
children
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's needs, it can inadvertently foster dependence.
This
Linking Words
 could potentially lead to a future where these individuals struggle to live independently as adults, lacking essential
skills
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 to maintain their
overall
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 well-being.
For example
Linking Words
, they may be unprepared to handle common health issues,
such
Linking Words
 as managing a fever.
Additionally
Linking Words
, over-indulgent
parents
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 often shield their
children
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 from facing consequences for
misbehavior
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misbehaviour
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.
This
Linking Words
 deprives
children
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 of opportunities to learn from mistakes, severely impacting their problem-solving
skills
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 in the future. In summary, over-indulgence can result in
unfavorable
Change the spelling
unfavourable
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 effects on
children
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 both in the short and long term, including delays in crucial skill development and long-term difficulties in coping with challenges as adults.

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coherence cohesion
To enrich your essay even further, consider incorporating a wider range of linking devices to smoothly connect ideas and paragraphs. While the current usage is effective, a greater variety can enhance readability and cohesion.
task achievement
While your essay is well-structured and presents a strong argument, integrating counterarguments could provide a more balanced perspective. Acknowledging opposing views and addressing them can strengthen your position and demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay effectively introduces and concludes the topic, providing clear insight into your views on child indulgence.
logical structure
The logical sequence of your arguments from immediate impacts to long-term consequences offers a strong, coherent structure that guides the reader through your perspective.
supported main points
The specific examples provided significantly support your main points, illustrating the real-world implications of indulging children.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your response comprehensively covers the topic, presenting clear, comprehensive ideas supported by relevant examples.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • indulgence
  • overindulgence
  • leniency
  • emotional resilience
  • rejection
  • entitlement
  • realistic expectations
  • self-regulated behavior
  • egocentric
  • financial management
  • professional relationships
  • collaboratively
  • criticism
  • appreciation
  • value
  • effort
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