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Writing Samples
Band 5

Computers and A.I technology are increasingly being used for online education Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?

#computers #technology #education #intelligence #development
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In the digital age,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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significant developments
such
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 as A.I inventions and computers, which are applied for online curriculum. The writer believes that these improvements would significantly boost the learning process, and I
also
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 think that these
technologies
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 will negatively impact
on
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apply
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society
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 because many
people
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 would over-rely on these tools. It is important to think that A.I platform will help students search the information more easily and deeply.
This
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 is because that
people
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 just need to type some
key words
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keywords
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 contained in their
question
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questions
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 into these
wed
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web
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site
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sites
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, which will
then
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 give them
many
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much
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 potential knowledge based on many famous theories.
Thus
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, students can gather these details into their
project
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projects
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 online, which
lead
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leads
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 to
a
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apply
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higher
mark
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marks
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 for their exams.
Moreover
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, these A.I software can be accessed whenever or wherever
,
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apply
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 which just
need
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needs
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 to be connected to the Internet. Chat GPT is a prime example,
this
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 A.I platform
provide
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provides
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 a variety of theories from many popular scientists, so individuals can do
many
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much
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 deeper research in their fields which can be done online.
Although
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 the merits mentioned above, applying computers and other
technologies
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 to the process of studying online will have some adverse influences. The fact that a huge increase in using A.I inventions within education, which will cause the over-reliance on these tools.
In other words
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, many
people
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 use A.I for their study in order to receive a high score in their exam,
therefore
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this
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 phenomenon will result in the boredom in the process of studying.
Furthermore
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, using these tools would cause
the
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apply
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unequal situations in
society
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, compared to other poor
people
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 who do not have any adequate
technologies
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.
As a result
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, these methods would cause many negative aspects for
people
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 and
society
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 that will affect the quality of education in the world.
To sum up
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, applying many A.
I
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Technology
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technologies
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 is a better way for
people
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 to take advantage of these developments, but I believe that the governments and schools
allow
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allowing
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people
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use
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to use
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technologies
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 would result in negative emotions
as well as
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 other problems for
society
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.

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Structure
Structure your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Introduce the topic and your viewpoint in the introduction. Discuss each point in separate paragraphs in the body, and summarize your opinion in the conclusion.
Cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices appropriately to help link ideas throughout the essay. This includes conjunctions, transitional phrases, and pronouns. Avoid over-reliance on one type of cohesive device.
Coherence
To increase the coherence of your essay, ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea supported by specific details or examples. This helps the reader follow your argument more easily.
Task Achievement
In terms of task response, make sure to address all parts of the prompt in your essay. Provide balanced viewpoints if the question requires discussing both sides, supported by relevant examples.
Examples
Use specific examples to support your arguments. This makes your points more convincing and your essay more informative. Try to include examples that are personal, hypothetical, or from credible sources.
Balanced Argument
Providing a balanced view by discussing both positive and negative impacts of AI in education.
Cohesion
Attempted to use cohesive devices to connect ideas, though with room for improvement.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • innovative platforms
  • customized learning
  • adaptability
  • efficiency
  • lifelong learning
  • automation
  • feedback mechanisms
  • educational resources
  • remote accessibility
  • critical thinking
  • emotional development
  • over-reliance
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