The graph below shows the percentage of female students on four different courses at one university from 1970 to 2015.

#percentage #students #four #courses #university

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The line graph compares the percentage of female learners of four courses at a specific college between 1970 and 2015. To summarise, the percentages of students

joined

Correct pronoun usage

who joined

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the four courses in the given period mostly increased, except the

computer

Use synonyms

science

Use synonyms

. Despite the percentage of female students

participated

Correct pronoun usage

who participated

show examples

computer

Use synonyms

science

Use synonyms

course

Fix the agreement mistake

courses

show examples

Wrong verb form

being

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the highest

initially

Linking Words

, it was surpassed by others within 30 years. The rate of low

Use synonyms

course

Fix the agreement mistake

courses

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was only a quarter of

computer

Use synonyms

science

Use synonyms

in 1970.

However

Linking Words

, it dramatically increased since 1975

Remove the comma

apply

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and reached approximately 100% in 2015. The trend of

computer

Use synonyms

science

Use synonyms

had a steady rise from 1970, but it declined to below 50% after 1990. The percentage of female participants in medicine

Use synonyms

course

Fix the agreement mistake

courses

show examples

had stably increased throughout the given period, and it had over 75% in 2015. The rising trend of

Correct article usage

the physic

show examples

physic

Replace the word

physics

show examples

course

Use synonyms

is comparatively smaller than the medicine and low

course

Use synonyms

, it only rose around 50% in the whole period.

Submitted by siuboong on Mon Apr 08 2024

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Vocabulary: Replace the words computer, science, course with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.

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2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

154 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

trend
male-dominated
steady
fluctuating
popularity
influence
societal changes
advocacy
gender equality
enrollment
academic disciplines
declines
plateau phases
gender diversity
inclusion
educational sector
workforce

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The graph below shows the percentage of female students on four different courses at one university from 1970 to 2015.

Some people think that young criminals should receive the same punishment as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Opinion

Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialize online rather than face-to-face. Why is this happening? Is this a positive or negative development?

In many schools and universities, girls tend to choose arts subjects (e.g. languages) and boys choose science subjects (e.g. Physics). What do you think are the reasons? Do you think that this tendency should be changed?

In some countries, more and more adults are living with their parents after graduating from college, university or even after finding a job. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?