IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Computers and A.I. technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience?

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There is an increase in using artificial intelligence and
computers
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 in studying online.
Therefore
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, the learning experience can be improved by AI because of its ability to make lessons more enjoyable and easy to remember.
However
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,
this
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 can lead to a negative development because it makes
students
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 dependent on technology.
Firstly
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, AI and
computers
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 can boost the learning experience
due to
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 their ability to help
students
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 be interested and easy to remember the lessons. To explain, those modern technologies have many functions that create quizzes to help online education be more interesting and increase
students
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' interest in studying.
For example
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, Kahoot, an online website, which is available on any computer and allows users to play quizzes with many different topics,
students
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 find it competitive and exciting to use their memory of the lessons they have learned to become the winner of the game,
therefore
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 they can have both new learning experiences and motivation in studying.
Secondly
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,
students
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 can be dependent on AI and
computers
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 as a negative result. In explanation, when having difficulty in studies,
students
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 will use
computers
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 or AI in order to find out the answers,
however
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,
this
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 causes
students
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 laziness to think about the answers.
For instance
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,
students
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 now are always in a hurry to look up everything on the internet or ask ChatGPT to write an essay without any brainstorming.
To conclude
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, artificial intelligence and
computers
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 can change
students
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' ways of gaining knowledge online by improving their interests.
However
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,
students
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 can easily depend on technology as a negative development.

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Sentence Variety
Ensure to have a more diverse range of sentence structures to add complexity to your arguments. This will not only make your essay more interesting but also demonstrate your language proficiency.
Detailed Arguments
Try to explore both the positive and negative aspects in more depth to provide a balanced argument. Include more detailed examples and explanations to support each viewpoint.
Transitional Phrases Variety
Be mindful of overreliance on certain phrases or transitional words. While these are crucial for cohesion, variety in transitions can enhance the fluidity of your essay.
Introduction and Conclusion
You've done a good job introducing and concluding your essay, clearly stating your argument and summarizing the main points at the end.
Use of Examples
Your examples, such as the use of Kahoot to illustrate how AI can make learning more enjoyable, are relevant and help to support your main points effectively.
Logical Structure
The structure of your essay is logical, with clear progression from introduction, through arguments, to conclusion, which makes your essay easy to follow.
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