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Band 6.5

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reason why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #reason #language #travel #work #country #someone
People
 have always tried to make connections with other nations in order to
due to
 various reasons.
However
, currently,
this
 tendency is increasing among ordinary
people
 considerably. On one hand, some
people
 assume that individuals tend to acquire knowledge of a new
language
 just for working and
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
.
On the other hand
, some others believe that there are more motivations to encourage
people
 to learn a non-native
language
. In
this
 essay, I will discuss both views and reveal my personal opinion in the conclusion part. As a matter of fact, for a long period of time business has been one of the main reasons based on which
people
 go for a new
language
. In fact, working with foreign
people
 or even working for other nations was the first reason
people
 had, and
also
 now, many
people
 have
this
 purpose as well.
In addition
,
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 overseas has always needed an acceptable range of knowledge about the destination
language
.
Therefore
, it causes numerous individuals to try to become familiar with other languages.
In contrast
, in the modern era,
people
 pursue new languages for various goals. First of all, studying as an international student in high-ranking universities is popular among new generations.
Besides
, being dynamic in the world academic institutes need linguistic know-how.
Furthermore
, a group of
people
 see learning a different
language
 as a challenge or entertainment or older persons use
language
 learning for better mental functionality and preventing Alzheimer’s diseases.
To sum up
, a group of
people
 consider work and travel as reasons for learning alien languages
although
 others presume abundant motivations. In my opinion,
although
 in the past
people
 just thought about business and immigration, nowadays
people
 who chase an alien
language
 have varied explanations
such
 as study, work, and hobby.
Submitted by justpersia20414 on

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Content Enrichment
Ensure more specific examples to illustrate each point made. While the essay presents clear arguments, incorporating targeted examples would enrich the content and provide a more persuasive argument.
Writing Style
Consider diversifying sentence structures to enhance the readability and engagement of the text. While the essay is well-structured, varied sentence types can add to the flow and keep the reader interested.
Task Response
The essay effectively discusses both perspectives on the importance of learning a foreign language and provides a clear personal stance in the conclusion, demonstrating a good understanding of the task.
Structure
Good job on presenting a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your discussion and giving your essay a strong start and finish.
Flow
You have maintained a logical flow of ideas throughout the essay, which helps in keeping the reader engaged and following your arguments smoothly.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • multilingual
  • linguistic proficiency
  • globalized world
  • cross-cultural communication
  • immersive experience
  • adaptability
  • cultural exchange
  • interpersonal skills
  • employment prospects
  • empathy
  • intellectual development
  • overcome language barriers
  • global market
  • resourceful
  • life-changing
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