IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

The diagrambelow show the conditionof paradise island in thepast and now. Summarisethe information byselecting and reportingthe main features, andmake comparisons whererelevant. Write at least 150words.

#diagrambelow #show #conditionof #paradise #island #thepast #summarisethe #information #reportingthe #features #andmake #comparisons #whererelevant
The maps display how an
island
 called Paradise when it was in the past and how it looks now.
Overall
, what
stand
Change the verb form
stands
show examples
 out from the pictures is that there has been
signigicant
Correct your spelling
significant
 development in terms of recreational facilities. Looking into detail,a hotel complex now occupies the left of
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
 where
Correct article usage
the Scientfic
show examples
Scientfic
Correct your spelling
Scientific
 Research Station used to be.
Moreover
,woodland which
situated
Add a missing verb
is situated
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 in the centre of the site,was chopped down to make way for a swimming pool,BBQ area as well open restaurant and
this
 restaurant has been connected to a hotel complex through
special
Add an article
the special
a special
show examples
 path. To the northwest of the map,there
has been
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
 the beach which remained unchanged and now people are permitted to swim there.Just below it,there was the pier, which improved
further
 and next to it ,a cruise ship has been added and replaced the boat. To the right of the
island
 ,there was
natural
Correct article usage
a natural
show examples
 spring and it has remained unchanged.Just bottom it ,the cafe has been constructed.
Furthermore
,To the northeast of the site,
scenic
Correct article usage
a scenic
show examples
 lookout has been added
as well as
cycle
Correct article usage
a cycle
show examples
 path which
run
Change the verb form
runs
show examples
 along the
island
 and
connect
Change the verb form
connects
show examples
 all
Correct your spelling
facilities
tacilities
Correct your spelling
facilities
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Introduction
Make a concise and clear introductory statement that clearly sets the scene. Doing so will establish a strong foundation for your analysis.
Structure
Consider the use of paragraphing to differentiate between the past and the present situation. This will also aid in the reader's understanding.
Grammar & Spelling
Be careful with spelling and grammar to ensure clarity and professionalism. For example, 'signigicant' should be 'significant', and 'Scientfic' should be 'Scientific'. These small adjustments can improve your score significantly.
Cohesion
Use transitional phrases to enhance the flow between sentences and paragraphs. This will strengthen the cohesion of your text.
Content Detail
You have successfully described changes on the island with relevant details.
Vocabulary
Good use of vocabulary to describe transformations and developments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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