IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018
#shops #country
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The line graph
illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
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 the number of shops closed and opened in a specific country between
2011and
Correct your spelling
2011 and
 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can seen that
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
 number of
closure
Fix the agreement mistake
closures
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 happened in the
year
Use synonyms
 2015
however
Linking Words
,
Add an article
the opening
an opening
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opening
Fix the agreement mistake
openings
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was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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less
Correct quantifier usage
fewer
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 by the end of the period. On one hand , openings of retail shops
was
Change the verb form
were
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 around 8500 in the
year
Use synonyms
 2011 but drastically
drop
Wrong verb form
dropped
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 in the next
year
Use synonyms
 2012 to 4000 and stood up to 6000 in
the
Change the article
apply
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2014 , but stable between 2015 and 2017 4000, before it
drop
Wrong verb form
dropped
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 to 3000 in 2018.
On the other hand
Linking Words
 ,
number
Change the article
a number
the number
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 of
stores
Change the noun form
store
show examples
 closures
is
Wrong verb form
was
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 approximately 6200 in the
year
Use synonyms
 2011, slightly
drop
Wrong verb form
dropping
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 in
following
Add an article
the following
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year
Use synonyms
 and
rise
Wrong verb form
rising
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 to 7100 in 2013 but
significant
Correct article usage
a significant
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 decline in 2015 from 6500 to around 300 . Increase 5100 in the next
year
Use synonyms
,
maintaine
Correct your spelling
maintained
maintain
 stead between 2016 to till
end
Add an article
the end
show examples
 of 2018 with 5100.
Submitted by nikhilguni on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 69%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "drop" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • trend
  • fluctuation
  • peak
  • decline
  • surge
  • stabilize
  • correlation
  • economic conditions
  • consumer behavior
  • technological advancements
  • urban development
  • employment
  • retail sector
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