In some countries, people who commit less serious crimes are made to undertake community service* instead of a prison sentence. Some people believe that all people who have committed a crime should be sent to prison. Do you agree or disagree?

#countries #people #crimes #community #service* #prison #sentence #crime

In a few nations, individual who commit less serious

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

show examples

, like stealing or breaking any law, is made to undertake

community

service

instead

Remove the article

apply

show examples

jail

While

others think that all individuals who have committed a

crime

might be sent to

jail

. I am completely convinced with the first view because if a person steals something, it is a

crime

but he can not be counted in the category of criminal,

however

, to kill someone, or plan/do a big robbery is a big

crime

. The people who agreed with the fact that a person who

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

committed a

crime

should be sent to

jail

is not worth it.

In other words

, not every

crime

is counted as

crime

Correct article usage

a crime

show examples

for instance

, if a person steals something, he commit a

crime

but he should not be sentenced to prison

becasue

Correct your spelling

because

stealing is

small

Add an article

a small

show examples

crime

to compare

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compared

show examples

with robbery or

to kill

Change the verb form

killing

show examples

someone. The environment of prison is not good for the people who committed a small

crime

this

can lead to encourage them to commit blunder. They should have

given

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been given

show examples

a chance to improve themselves by doing some

community

service work

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apply

show examples

so that they will not repeat that again. Moving towards another notion, the

criminals

who commit a big

crime

such

as murder,

robbery

Correct word choice

or robbery

show examples

, should be sentenced to prison because these

criminals

are

threat

Add an article

a threat

show examples

to society. Their mentality is different from normal human beings. The chance to work in

community

service could not help them to change their mentality.

Therefore

, the actual

criminals

deserved

Wrong verb form

deserve

show examples

to stay away from our

community

. In conclusion, people who commit small

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

show examples

should be given a chance for improvement rather than to

jail

sentence. I am completely

convined

Correct your spelling

convinced

with

this

idea because

criminals

who commit big

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

show examples

are more likely to

sent

Add a missing verb

be sent

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

jail

Submitted by maliksheetal32 on Thu Apr 18 2024

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Introduction

Beginning with a clear introduction and stating your opinion sets a strong tone for the essay. Aim to do this distinctly to guide the reader.

Language Use

Use varied sentence structures and more complex vocabulary to enhance your argument. This will make your essay more engaging and reflect a higher level of English proficiency.

Supporting Examples

Providing specific examples can effectively support your main points. Whenever possible, include real-world situations or hypothetical examples to illustrate your arguments more vividly.

Paragraph Structure

Strive for clearer paragraphing with specific topic sentences. Each paragraph should begin with a clear idea that is then explained and supported throughout the paragraph.

Conclusion

Ensure your conclusion succinctly summarizes your essay's key points and your stance on the topic. A well-crafted conclusion reinforces your argument and leaves a lasting impression on the reader.

Position

Your essay clearly presents a stance, supporting the idea that not all crimes should receive prison sentences.

Argumentation

You effectively use comparisons to differentiate between minor and major crimes, supporting your argument for community service in certain cases.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

297 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In some countries, people who commit less serious crimes are made to undertake community service* instead of a prison sentence. Some people believe that all people who have committed a crime should be sent to prison. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that schools should teach foreign languages for primary school children. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

A lot of people believe that the amount of violence shown on TV and in the cinema affects the actions of our young people and therefore increases the amount of violence in our society today. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? What can be done to reduce violence in our society today?

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree?