IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

It is thought by some that it is better to live in a city while others believe that life is better in the country side. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

#city #life #country #side
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some
people
Use synonyms
 opine that it is better to live in a
city
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, others state that the different opinions on it. In my view, it would be better to live in a
city
Use synonyms
, and I will discuss the pros and the cons in the following paragraphs. On the one hand, living in a
city
Use synonyms
 is good because you can go to a facility if you want quickly. Life is wonderful and
colorful
Change the spelling
colourful
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in a big
city
Use synonyms
, you can see a lot of companies that are hiring staff.
Therefore
Linking Words
, more and more
people
Use synonyms
 would like to live there.
For example
Linking Words
, my ex-job which was an analyst at Taipei Fubon Bank was in Taipei
City
Use synonyms
. Almost all of my co-workers were from different locations in Taiwan. They moved here, because of their careers. Salary in
capital
Add an article
the capital
a capital
show examples
city
Use synonyms
 is much higher than in other places.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the countryside is not the place
people
Use synonyms
 would like to live in,
due to
Linking Words
 inconvenience.
However
Linking Words
, there are some good things in the countryside,
such
Linking Words
 as fresh air, quiet surroundings, trees, and so forth.
As a result
Linking Words
, some part of
people
Use synonyms
 like
this
Linking Words
 environment. They have lived in that sort of place for a long time. In a nutshell, I would like to say no matter where you live, your
neighborhood
Change the spelling
neighbourhood
show examples
 must have some merits and demerits. In a
city
Use synonyms
, you can have a lot of fun there, and
people
Use synonyms
 like to go there
for working
Change preposition
to work
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, in a remote area, you will feel more quiet,
nature
Change preposition
with nature
show examples
, wildlife, etc. It depends on your preference. In my perspective, it would be better, if you chose a
city
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by edward300225 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Ensure a balanced discussion by providing more detailed examples and explanations for both city and countryside living.
Task Achievement
Expand on your conclusion to more clearly reflect on the arguments made, providing a more definitive stance based on the discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to use a broader range of cohesive devices and transition words to enhance the flow between ideas and paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures to add complexity and depth to your writing, as this can improve readability and engagement.
Introduction
You clearly introduced the topic and provided a clear thesis statement.
Supporting Examples
Good use of examples to support your points, especially the personal example about job opportunities in Taipei.
Task Response
You successfully discussed both viewpoints before stating your personal opinion, meeting the requirement of the task.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: