As countries develop, their populations tend to live individually or in small family units. What are the causes of this trend and what are the effects on society？
Nowadays, citizens are more willing to live individually or in a small family
unit
. Based on my observations, technology has advanced in the past few decades. It encourages people
to live independently or in tiny family units. With this
trend, it will possibly brings
negative effects on Change the verb form
bring
society
.
Firstly
, communication technology improved a lot. People
can easily talk with others by calling them. There is no necessarily
need to live in a big family anymore. Change the word
necessary
For instance
, I have a family group in
WhatsApp. My sister is living in Taiwan. Change preposition
on
However
, we still have a lot of conversation
. Fix the agreement mistake
conversations
In other words
, distance no
longer a barrier in families. Add a missing verb
is no
Therefore
, with the technology improved nowadays, it allows residents live
individually or in a tiny family Fix the infinitive
to live
unit
.
On the other hand
, living alone or in a small family unit
are
possibly bring negative effects on Verb problem
can
society
. It will let people
abandon the style of staying in big
family, which Add an article
a big
weaken
the bond of family. Correct subject-verb agreement
weakens
Thus
, when parents got
old, they will require more help from Wrong verb form
get
the
Correct article usage
apply
society
. Meanwhile, it escalated the burden of
the government. Change preposition
on
For instance
, there are lots of elderly being sent to caring
Replace the word
care
centre
in Hong Kong. Fix the agreement mistake
centres
Those
elderly have no ability to afford the payment of the Correct determiner usage
The
caring
centre, which requires the government to provide allowances for them. Replace the word
care
Therefore
, with
the trend of populations tend to live individually or in a small family Correct word choice
apply
unit
will bring detrimental effects to the
Correct article usage
apply
society
.
To sum up
, new generations are more desiring to live alone or in a small family unit
. It affect
the bonding of Change the verb form
affects
people
in society
and could harming
peoples’ Change the verb form
harm
be harming
relationship
.Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
Submitted by oscar77734644 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Introduction
Consider enhancing the introduction by clearly stating the causes and effects you will discuss. This sets a clear expectation for the reader.
Supporting Evidence
Expand on your examples to show a deeper analysis of the causes and effects. More detailed examples can better support your points.
Cohesion
Try to use a wider variety of connectors and transition phrases to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs. This helps in making your essay more coherent.
Balanced Argument
In discussing the effects on society, ensure to explore both positive and negative outcomes to provide a balanced view.
Conclusion
When concluding, restate the main points briefly and clearly. A strong conclusion reinforces your arguments and leaves a lasting impression.
Use of Examples
Good use of technology as an example to illustrate why people prefer living individually or in small family units.
Understanding of Topic
You've effectively identified a significant trend and its potential societal impact, showing a good understanding of the topic.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...