Advertising is all around us; it is an unavoidable part of everyone’ life. Some people say that advertising is a positive part of our lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?/
In recent years, marketing of
products
and services has significant impact on general public life hence
it is argued by some people that this
is a positive trend in society. This
has its own rewards and detriments. Both, the pros and cons are discussed further
.
Discussing the gains of advertising, the biggest is that awareness of different kinds of products
spread across the globe which will help consumers to find the best suitable products
in the market, motivating them to buy them. This
will eventually not only improve their lifestyle but also
significantly grow the economy as people spend more. For example
, Google Ads
, an
advertising platform to promote goods online to its Add a missing verb
is an
users
. It's promotes the most relevant ads
of items, which users
most likely to buy so it helps users
find the right product. Furthermore
, advertisement plays a paramount role in the growth of a business. For instance
, It is seen that businesses spending heavily on marketing themselves have seen faster growth and are able to expand their businesses in new regions. As a result
, more employment gets
created in the economy.
Verb problem
is
On the contrary
, there are some drawbacks too. To begin
with, customers tend to spend more than usual when they are bombarded with lots of ads
through online and online mediums. This
is because of advancements in technology which businesses are able to determine users
' spending habits and consumer behavior toward the products
. Additionally
, in recent years, people are struggling financially
peers. Besides
this
, showing unethical ads
leads society to waste workforce money on useless products
and services.
To recapitulate, there are a few demerits such
as overspending and false marketing but there are many merits like easy to find
value money Add a hyphen
easy-to-find
products
that also
contribute to the economy.Submitted by pramodv997 on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with distinguishable introduction, body paragraphs and conclusion, which is excellent. However, paying closer attention to transitional phrases could enhance the flow between ideas even further. Consider using a wider range of linking words to show the relationship between ideas more explicitly.
Task Achievement
You've done well to cover the topic comprehensively, including both the positive and negative aspects of advertising. To elevate your essay, focus on fully developing your arguments, especially in the paragraphs discussing the drawbacks of advertising, where your ideas were introduced but not fully explored. Expanding on your examples and linking them more explicitly to the main point could also strengthen your essay.
Grammar and Accuracy
There are minor grammatical errors and some awkward phrasing throughout the essay. For a higher score, proofread your essay for grammatical accuracy and aim for more natural expression. Refining your use of complex sentence structures could also improve your essay.
Structure and Organization
You have demonstrated a good understanding of the essay topic and structured your response well, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Supporting Examples
You provided relevant examples to support your points, which is key in illustrating the impact of advertising on consumers and the economy.
Balanced Argument
Your essay engages with both sides of the argument effectively, providing a balanced view on the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.