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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main feutures, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main feutures, and make comparisons where relevant.
#tourists #caribbean #island #summarise #information #feutures #comparisons
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The graph illustrates the amount of
visitors
Use synonyms
 visiting a Caribbean
island
Use synonyms
 and their preference
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 accommodation from 2010 to 2017.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Correct article usage
the numbers
show examples
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of
visitors
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 Caribbean
Island
Use synonyms
was increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
steadily throughout
7 years
Correct your spelling
the 7-year
 period. Between
two
Correct article usage
the two
show examples
accommodation
Fix the agreement mistake
accommodations
show examples
, expenditure
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 staying on
cruise
Use synonyms
ship
Fix the agreement mistake
ships
show examples
rose significantly over
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 but fluctuated in staying on
Add an article
the
show examples
island
Use synonyms
. Despite
this
Linking Words
, the total amount of
visitors
Use synonyms
 that flowed into staying on
Add an article
the
show examples
island
Use synonyms
 was higher than
a
Change preposition
on a
show examples
cruise
Use synonyms
. Accommodation on the
island
Use synonyms
 received over five hundred
visitors
Use synonyms
 between 2010 and 2011, which
then
Linking Words
 rose significantly to approximately 1. 5
million
Use synonyms
 in 2013 and has not changed until 2016. After
remained
Wrong verb form
remaining
show examples
 constant, there was a
slightly
Change the adverb
slight
show examples
 drop in 2016 before rose back to 1. 5
million
Use synonyms
 again in 2017. In 2010,
visitors
Use synonyms
 that stayed on the
cruise
Use synonyms
 reached just less than five hundred
visitors
Use synonyms
, eventually the numbers rose to five hundred
visitors
Use synonyms
 in 2011 and
then
Linking Words
falling
Wrong verb form
fell
show examples
 back to 2010 levels in 2012. Following 2012 there was a significant resurgence that
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 a high point
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 2
million
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
visitors
Use synonyms
 in 2017. In conclusion, the total
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
number of tourists
show examples
 that come to
Caribbean
Correct article usage
the Caribbean
show examples
Fix the agreement mistake
Islands
show examples
Island
Use synonyms
 has a stable growth from 2010 until 2017 and has not collapsed.
Therefore
Linking Words
, 2016 and 2017
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 the only
years
Change to a genitive case
year's
years'
show examples
cruise
Use synonyms
 levels of
visitors
Use synonyms
 exceeded the
island
Use synonyms
's, with values over 2
million
Use synonyms
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
respectively.
Submitted by nadiaanandh on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors, island, cruise, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 3 times.
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