(VMN)Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, government should focus on reducing environment pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is argued that preventing disease and illness requires a solution for declining environmental pollution and housing issues from the government. The writer contends that the urgent call of the

government's

Change the noun form

governments

government

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is essential to alert the citizens and, together, solve existing problems

such

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as polluted

water

Use synonyms

or housing pressure. It is undeniable that a part of the world's

water

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has been polluted in recent years.

Water

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pollution, which is a basic human necessity, has a serious impact on people's health. It is shown that

water

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is the main source of many dangerous

water

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-borne diseases,

such

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as Ebola. Without a proper guide, an individual's health can worsen and even lead to death.

Due to

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that, the government is responsible for dealing with the unprocessed waste poured down the rivers by the factories.

Moreover

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, it is needed to enhance citizens’ awareness of putting litter in trash bins and not littering, especially in streams and rivers. These actions,

therefore

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, can limit the potential for suffering from some relevant dangerous diseases

as well as

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improve the inhabitants’ lives. Another point worth considering is in terms of housing. The significant rise in population has led to the problem of overlooking sanity in the workplace and living places. Following the hustle and bustle in many cities, city dwellers likely spend less time paying attention to the sanitized level in their

house

Fix the agreement mistake

houses

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This

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results in the formation of an unclean and messy environment where thousands of deadly bacteria are hiding, ready to give the victim a chance to get a dangerous illness.

Hence

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, having a sanity restriction and encouraging residents to keep their living places tidy

are

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essential.

To sum up

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, recent developments have altered the living environment, causing more issues that profoundly influence daily life.

Thus

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, the government’s attention and action are crucial to alleviating these troubles and improving the inhabitants' health.

Mon Apr 22 2024

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Introduction Clarity

Make sure your introduction clearly outlines the view you will be taking on the topic. Providing a succinct thesis statement will help to make your stance clearer from the beginning.

Cohesive Devices

Increase the range of cohesive devices used within and between paragraphs to better link ideas and improve flow. This can include more varied conjunctions and discourse markers.

Specific Examples

Enhance the precision of your arguments by including more specific examples and data where possible. This strengthens your case and makes your essay more convincing.

Grammar and Spelling

Remember to proofread your text for minor grammatical errors and typing mistakes to enhance overall clarity and professionalism.

Structure

Your essay presents a well-structured argument that explores significant aspects of the topic, showing strong coherence and cohesion.

Conclusion

The conclusion effectively summarizes the essay's main points, reinforcing your stance and offering a comprehensive closure.

Content Relevance

You have done well in linking the government's role to the public health implications of environmental issues, showing a good understanding of the task requirements.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

306 words

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(VMN)Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, government should focus on reducing environment pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

Some people prefer to travel in their own country when they have some time off. Others think that it is better to take a trip to a foreign country. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons to support your choice.

In recent years, the structure of a family and the role of its members are gradually band changing. What kinds of changes can occur? Do you think these changes are positive and negative?

Many people believe working from home is better than going to an office. Others believe it is better to work in an office environment. Discuss both views and give your own opinion about it.