These days, many people enjoy watching sports on TV. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In the contemporary era, watching

sports

matches on

has become a popular leisure activity, and it is enjoyed by many individuals. In my opinion, I think that watching

sports

can bring about more advantages for the audience compared to any problems it might bring. Despite the drawbacks below, I believe the benefits gained from watching

sports

are extremely useful for the audience.

Firstly

, spectators have the opportunity to spend their leisure time supporting their favourite team, which can clearly help them overcome stress and stay free from problems that they face in their lives. To put it simply, when they are depressed or struggling with their lives, they can entertain themselves by watching

sports

with their family and friends.

Secondly

, observing sportsmen

while

they are performing in their matches,

such

as tennis and volleyball matches, can inspire them to be actively involved in

sports

. Admittedly, there are some issues involved when it comes to watching

sports

matches on

. One problem is that it may cause people to have anger issues

due to

the excessive support of their favourite team, which can lead to bad

behaviours

Fix the agreement mistake

behaviour

show examples

For instance

, there have been many fights among the audiences in restaurants in some countries that show football matches on

. Another problem is that

this

can cause addiction. To put it simply, some games are shown late at night, and because of

this

, many people do not have enough sleep, which clearly can impact their performance the next day, especially when they have to work or study.

To sum up

, spending quality time with friends and family

as well as

being inspired to be active in

sports

far outweigh any of the minor drawbacks that can result from watching

sports

Submitted by s_syedy on Mon Apr 22 2024

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Task Achievement

Make sure to include more diverse and specific examples to support your points. While you presented a general view, including a range of examples could enhance your argument further.

Coherence & Cohesion

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Coherence & Cohesion

Great job on presenting a clear and well-structured argument that flows logically from introduction to conclusion.

Task Achievement

Your essay effectively responds to the task, clearly presenting your opinion and discussing both advantages and disadvantages.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

296 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Young people are often influenced by their peers. This is called peer group pressure. Do the advantages outweight disadvantages?

In recent years, online education is becoming more and more popular. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this phenomenon? Use specific details and examples to explain your opinion.

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