Some people believe that modern technology encourages more social behavior. Others say that this leads to lesser sociable behavior. Discuss both views with examples and provide your opinion.
There is an ever-increasing use of
technology
, such
as smartphones or tablets. While
many claim that technological inclusion incentivizes users to be more socially active, others argue that this
can result in a more isolated attitude. This
essay agrees that modern technology
affects social interaction in a negative way.
On the one hand, it appears to some people
that users can engage in social situations better by spending as much time as possible with technology
. Proponents believe that individuals can convey their feelings more effectively through written formats such
as texting or sending emails, for they can make use of the emojis and stickers available, thus
promoting social connections. However
, this
is a flawed proposition since online attachment doesn’t relate to the feelings when people
communicate face-to-face. That is
to say, human beings tend to be in
Change preposition
at
loss
of words when it comes to Correct article usage
a loss
expresssing
their emotions so the more time they spend online, the less flexible they are to keep eye contact.
Correct your spelling
expressing
On the other hand
, technology
can pose a threat to the community’s social skills, such
as communication and interpersonal skills. The main reason is they do not understand how they do during the conversation. It would cause nations to give up interacting with each other in real life. For example
, people
prefer using electronic products to contact business clients or relatives rather than using the face-to-face method.
In conclusion, the changes in technology
are necessary for society because it
Correct pronoun usage
they
improves
our Correct subject-verb agreement
improve
life
but Fix the agreement mistake
lives
it
can Correct pronoun usage
they
also
affect the way people
interact with each other. Although
new technology
just decreases the inconvenience issues in our life
, it does not solve all of the problems we meet.Fix the agreement mistake
lives
Submitted by banhbao0565 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Balance and Development
Ensure each paragraph is clearly focused on a single main idea. While your essay presents a clear stance, the discussion of each viewpoint could be more balanced by expanding on the reasons behind each perspective.
Linking Words
Incorporate a wider range of linking words and phrases to enhance the flow of your essay. This will improve coherence and the reader’s ability to follow your arguments.
Specific Examples
Include more specific examples to support your points. Real-life instances or hypothetical scenarios can strengthen your argument and make your essay more persuasive.
Clear Stance
Your essay presents a clear stance on the issue, which is good for task achievement.
Essay Structure
The structure of your essay, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, effectively supports its logical flow.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?