Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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Now, at the time of the development of the
Internet
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, everyone can find and learn about their diseases, diagnosis and
treatment
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. People are used to being treated for many diseases themselves despite the fact that these consequences can cause complications. I think
this
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often happens to the elderly, even I can say that even my grandmother prefers to go to
Internet
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resources than to the
doctor
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himself. Sometimes there are
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such
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recipes that
sometimes
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border on wildness, and there is no need to talk about their absurdity. a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments
instead
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of visiting their usual
doctor
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. And gradually the
Internet
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replaces doctors. Why? Of course, the doctors themselves are partly to blame for
this
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: first of all, the quality of medical care suits not everyone, long queues at the reception, hours of sitting in front of the
doctor
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's office, the
doctor
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's rush during the appointment, and there is no need to talk about the cost of visiting a good specialist in a
paid
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pain
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clinic. And if we take into account the acceleration of the rhythm of modern life, when going to the
doctor
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is considered
as
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a simple waste of time,
then
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all
this
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pushes the population to self-medicate. But
this
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trend is taking place not only in our country
,
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but all over the world, including in countries with an excellent level of health care. Patients do not trust doctors,
treatment
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is expensive, and information about methods of
treatment
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and medicines comes from all sides. In modern conditions, advertising of medicines is of fundamental importance and actually performs the role of a
doctor
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.
Nevertheless
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,
treatment
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should be prescribed by specialists. After all, medicine does not stand still, like any science.
Treatment
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methods are being improved, some drugs fade into the background
due to
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the identified toxicity or low efficacy,
new
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and new
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ones appear. In the
treatment
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of almost any disease, there are always many nuances, because there are no two absolutely identical organisms in nature. Ignorance of these subtleties can play a very evil joke
with
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on
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a lover of
Internet
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self-
treatment
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. After all, medicine was, is and will always be the most difficult science. So I think it's a negative development.
Submitted by kooper507 on

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Task Response
To enhance task response, delve deeper into discussing both sides of the argument. While your essay leans towards the negatives of self-medication, including benefits in a balanced manner will strengthen your position.
Coherence and Cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, work on linking ideas more seamlessly. Using a variety of linking words and clear paragraphing will improve the flow of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
To improve coherence further, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. This will make your essay easier to follow.
Task Achievement
You have presented a clear viewpoint throughout the essay, which is excellent for task achievement.
Task Achievement
Your essay uses examples effectively to support your points, enhancing the essay's persuasiveness.
Coherence and Cohesion
You've established a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your essay well.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • treatments
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • health problems
  • usual doctor
  • access
  • personalized approach
  • holistic well-being
  • lack of regulation
  • evidence-based research
  • proper medical treatment
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