Some people believe that there are many reasons that can motivate a person to keep working for the same company whereas others say that money is the main reason. Do you agree or disagree
There are numerous
factors
that drive our motivation to work
for the same company
for a long time period. Whilst proponents of this
notion believe that finance is the main reason that anchors employees at work
, others share an opposing view by claiming that the number of factors
that influence an employee
to be loyal is far more than one. It is my contention that despite there are many points that can leave a significant impact on individuals
' lives, one of them can be elicited depending on the conditions.
First and foremost, I think the most important factors
that assist individuals
to be part of a company
originate from different hygiene factors
such
as work
environment
, employee
benefits and future prospects. To exemplify this
statement, a person can still submit a resignation letter even though he/she makes a significant amount of money due to
factors
like a toxic environment
and a dead-end position. Furthermore
, particularly the young generation is motivated by the fulfilment of modern technologies and trends to blend in with the environment
.
Moreover
, money has become a salient factor that impacts individuals
' decision to continue their career with a company
. A competitive salary not only meets basic needs but also
serves as a tangible recognition of one's skills and knowledge. However
, anticipating employee
motivation solely with monetary rewards falls
insufficient in persuading them to stay for longer periods. Verb problem
is
For instance
, individuals
also
seek supplementary benefits such
as business culture and development opportunities at work
. The potential for development and professional growth is a powerful motivator, as it aligns with personal aspirations and the desire for self-improvement.
In conclusion, while
money is a rudimentary motivator, it is not the sole factor that binds employees to a company
. A holistic approach encompassing professional advancement, a nurturing work
environment
, and personal development opportunities is essential for sustained employee
retention.Submitted by orkhanshamil on
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task response
To enhance the essay, it's crucial to integrate more specific examples that illustrate your points. While the essay discusses general ideas effectively, providing real-life cases or studies would enhance the relevance and depth of your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a good command of logical structure, which helps in delivering your arguments in a clear and organized manner. To further improve coherence, consider using a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas within and between paragraphs more fluidly.
task response
In your introduction, clearly state whether you agree or disagree with the statement to provide a more direct answer to the question. This will enhance the clarity of your stance throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
For a higher score in 'supported main points,' aim to develop each argument with more detailed explanations and examples. Doing so will make your essay more persuasive and informative.
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