Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, government showed focus on reducing enviromental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #illness #disease #government #focus #pollution

It is said that

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

showed

Verb problem

paid

show examples

attention to

reduce

Wrong verb form

reducing

show examples

the polluted

enviroment

Correct your spelling

environment

and

properties

Change the noun form

property

show examples

problems

to avoid

disease

and illness.

This

writer

agree

Change the verb form

agrees

show examples

with the statement that illness and

disease

can be prevented

through

Change preposition

show examples

reducing pollution and housing

problems

due to

the places people live

affect

Wrong verb form

affecting

show examples

their

health

and the

enviroment

Correct your spelling

environment

is the

sourse

Correct your spelling

source

of food and drink for people to consume.

Firstly

, the place you live,

work

Correct word choice

and work

show examples

in has a big impact on your

health

This

is true

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because it is the place where you mostly stay in, as it is full of dust, you may have

problems

with

lungs

Correct pronoun usage

your lungs

show examples

and breathing.

Similar

Change the word

Similarly

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

, if the place you live is wet and filthy, you are likely to be infected by some

disease

Fix the agreement mistake

diseases

show examples

by insects

such

as mosquitos... .

Thus

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

improves the working and living

enviroment

Correct your spelling

environment

is the right to help you

Verb problem

apply

show examples

prevent

disease

or any other

health

problems

. Moving to

other point

Change the wording

another point

other points

show examples

that

worth

Add a missing verb

is worth

show examples

considering is that saving the

enviroment

Correct your spelling

environment

is saving the food and drink that you consume. It is a fact that all the vegetable, meat, water,... comes from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

nature

due to

that, if the

nature

enviroment

Correct your spelling

environment

is polluted, the

thing

Fix the agreement mistake

things

show examples

that you consume will be

unsafed

Correct your spelling

unsaved

unsafe

safe

as well.

For instance

, when you litter a plastic bag

Change preposition

show examples

the ocean, the fish thinks it is food

then

Correct word choice

and then

show examples

eat

Correct subject-verb agreement

eats

show examples

the bag, that fish may be eaten by many other

fishs

Correct your spelling

fishes

fish

however

Correct word choice

and

show examples

the

platic

Correct your spelling

plastic

bag will eventually go into our dishes as we consume

fishs

Correct your spelling

fish

fishes

Therefore

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

nature

is what we consume, so saving

nature

is the way to save ourselves from illness.

To conclude

, the

goverment

Correct your spelling

government

shows focus on saving

Correct article usage

the enviroment

show examples

enviroment

Correct your spelling

environment

and hosing

problems

is actually helpful for people in order to improve our

health

and prevent

them

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

disease

and

illess

Correct your spelling

illness

because

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

nature

and house

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

what we rely on.

Submitted by [email protected] on Wed Apr 24 2024

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coherence cohesion

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task achievement

Try to more accurately proofread your work to eliminate minor grammatical errors and typos, even though this has not impacted your score, striving for accuracy can enhance the clarity of your argument.

task achievement

Incorporate a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely and effectively. This can enrich your essay and reflect a higher level of English proficiency.

coherence cohesion

Strong logical structure, effectively introducing, discussing, and concluding your viewpoints.

task achievement

Good use of specific examples to support your points, enhancing the overall persuasiveness of your essay.

Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
43Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

310 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, government showed focus on reducing enviromental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

Some people think that the best way to improve road safety is to increase the minimum legal age for driving a car or motor-bike. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The problems caused by work-related stress (such as lack of productivity) have become a concern for both employers and workers. What do you think are the main causes of work- related stress and how they can be avoid?

Public celebrations( such as national days, festivals, etc) are held in most countries. Theses are often quite expensive and some people say that governments should spend money on more useful things Do you agree or disagree?