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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some feel that cities shold be designed to be beautiful while others feel their functionality is more important. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

#feel #cities #shold #functionality
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It is believed by some that beautiful
cities
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 are essential
while
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 others say it is their functions are way more important. In the following paragraphs, both viewpoints will be outlined before a conclusion is reached. On the one hand, impressive scenery in
cities
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 can explain the traditions of their countries to the world. Most people are intrigued by something that they are not used to or have no experience with
such
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 as arts, local culture and customs. Creating or decorating the
cities
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 with these things tends to be a big pull factor that can attract tourists from other parts of the world to visit those areas.
Moreover
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, when the tourists are going back to their hometowns, they will spread and tell others what they encounter in their visit.
On the other hand
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, functional
cities
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 will bring money to their societies. Building city centres that provide state-of-the-art facilities and amenities, arguably engages investors both inside and outside of the countries that always find places to
further
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 invest their money in those areas. These areas will turn into downtown with comprehensive transport systems and it will bring more investors all over again. It
also
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 gives dwellers convenience and
enhance
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enhances
show examples
 their lives,
as well as
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 boosting their sense of purpose. In conclusion, authorities should blend both points of view together to develop as it can help their
cities
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 become destinations for travellers and investors that will bring benefits not only to local merchants but
also
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 to dwellers in the
cities
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.
Additionally
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, to spread their traditions to the world and earn money to develop their countries in the future.
Submitted by nnatthinee on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and consistent argument throughout your essay. Your points are well-developed, but refining the link between them could strengthen your argument further.
task achievement
Consider expanding your examples and analyses to deepen the exploration of each viewpoint. This will enrich your essay and provide a more comprehensive discussion.
task achievement
You have effectively addressed all parts of the task, providing a balanced discussion of both viewpoints before reaching a coherent conclusion that reflects your own opinion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-organized, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs that discuss each viewpoint, and a conclusion that summarizes your position. This structure greatly aids in the readability and coherence of your writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Aesthetic appeal
  • Cultural heritage
  • Infrastructure
  • Urban planning
  • Sustainable development
  • Psychological well-being
  • Economic growth
  • Tourism industry
  • Architectural marvels
  • Public spaces
  • Accessibility
  • Environmental impact
  • Residential areas
  • Commercial hubs
  • Green spaces
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