Writing Task 2: You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Tourists should pay more when visiting a different country than locals when visiting
cutural
Correct your spelling
cultural
and historical
attraction
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attractions
show examples
. A view that I usually
seen
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see
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while
dicussing
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discussing
tourists
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tourist
show examples
attractions. I agree that tourists should pay to support my claim I will provide
evidences
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evidence
pieces of evidence
shreds of evidence
show examples
and reasons in
this
essay. Primarily, these tourist
attraction
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attractions
show examples
become
attraction
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attractions
show examples
becasue
Correct your spelling
because
of local cultures, history and their local
visitors
Change to a genitive case
visitor's
visitors'
show examples
belief
Fix the agreement mistake
beliefs
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. foreign
visitors
comes
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come
show examples
to these countries to experience new
thing
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things
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that set them apart from others.
Furthermore
, if in case, these profound temples and natural resources were to
absent
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be absent
show examples
in future, there
will
Wrong verb form
would
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be no foreign
visitors
and their economy might take a huge fall and may even create
scenario
Add an article
a scenario
the scenario
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of crisis.
Secondly
, every
countires
Correct your spelling
countries
country
have
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has
show examples
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
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own cultures and historical beliefs that are
reffered
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referred
as
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to as
show examples
attraction
Fix the agreement mistake
attractions
show examples
, in which, many countries are drastically poor and unable to make a living without these attractions.
For instance
, Indonesia is one of those countries
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
rely almost 10-15% on foreign
visitors
to support their economy.
Additionally
, these foreign
visitors
bring businesses that
creates
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create
show examples
jobs for
lcoals
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locals
,
that
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which
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furher
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further
support
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
show examples
. In conclusion, I completely agree that foreign
visitors
should pay more than
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
local
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locals
show examples
to visit these historical
attraction
Fix the agreement mistake
attractions
show examples
.
Submitted by nycnick995 on

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Language Variety
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Transitions
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Grammar & Spelling
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Clear Position
You have presented a clear position throughout the essay, which is good for meeting the task requirement.
Logical Structure
The structure of your essay is logical, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Understanding of Topic
Your essay provides a reasonable argument for why tourists should pay more, showing an understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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