The media has become too influential in peoples lives today and this is a negative development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In today's fast-paced
world
, the
media
and the internet play a crucial role in our day-to-day lives. I completely disagree with the idea that social
media
has negative results.
while
some believe that social
media
could waste our time and compromise privacy, I contend that
media
could have both pros and cons and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will elaborate on my opinion. On the one hand, some argue that the
media
could be detrimental to human society. They state that a large part of our time in the day is devoted to social
media
.
As a result
, we forget to do other work or activities like hanging out with friends and doing physical activities.
Although
people
share their holidays and weekend activities with other
people
by posting photos or videos on social
media
, they seriously sacrifice their privacy and share anything of their lives, even private ones, with strangers.
On the other hand
, it is obvious that the latest
news
is released by social
media
at the moment. In the past,
people
all over the
world
waited for the morning newspaper or cable TV channel to be aware of what was happening across the globe. Fortunately, nowadays, thanks to social
media
such
as X, Facebook and Instagram, the
news
spreads all over the
world
in a second and there is no difference between
people
from various countries.
For example
, the
news
about COVID-19 in China was broadcast all over the
world
quickly and other countries had a chance to do some precautionary acts in order to prevent
this
virus.
In addition
, we can change our social
media
's privacy and policy setting to prevent misuse.
Thus
, by social
media
and the internet, it is much easier than in the past to know about a variety of
news
and events, like political, social and economic ones. In conclusion,
while
some
people
argue that the
media
should be banned and restricted
due to
some reasons, regardless of all these causes, I strongly believe in the freedom to use the
media
for any purpose, because it is capable of increasing our awareness about the
world
's latest
news
.The
media
has become too influential in
peoples
Change noun form
people's
show examples
lives today and
this
is a negative development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Submitted by hesam.kord.f on

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Structure
Continue to structure your essays with clear, distinct paragraphs representing different ideas or aspects of your argument.
Example
Use specific examples to support your viewpoints; this strengthens your argument and makes it more convincing.
Balance in Argument
Maintain a balance in discussing both sides of an argument before stating your own opinion. This showcases your ability to understand and evaluate different perspectives.
Specific advice related to content
Monitor your privacy settings on social media to prevent misuse.
Thesis Statement
Ensure you have a clear thesis statement that guides your essay; it helps in making your stance clear from the beginning.
Grammar
Check your essay for minor grammatical errors to refine your writing further. Achieving a more polished essay can impact your score positively.
Engagement and Clarity
Engaged with the topic directly and provided a balanced view before expressing a clear personal stance.
Organization
Organized your essay well, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which made your argument easy to follow.
Language Use
Used a variety of complex sentences and vocabulary to express your ideas, enhancing the quality of your writing.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • influential
  • sensationalism
  • conglomerates
  • biased
  • misinformation
  • exacerbating
  • constant exposure
  • unrealistic standards
  • homogenization
  • critical thinking
  • foster
  • community engagement
  • social change
  • public opinion
  • perceptions
  • corporate interests
  • mental health issues
  • traditional cultural
  • educational sources
  • responsibly
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