The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.

#plans #show #park #first

The maps show recreation area facilities, consisting of two gates; the upper one for Arnold Avenue and below for Eldon Street, flowers, water

feature

Fix the agreement mistake

features

show examples

performing

Correct article usage

a performing

show examples

area, and places to sit. I will discuss the changes

occurred

Correct pronoun usage

that occurred

show examples

during the present moment compared to the time when Grange

Park

was

initially

established.

To begin

with, let us consider the location of the attributes in the top diagram. The centre of the

park

is a fountain. Three other garden attractions were a small lake with aquatic plants, spaces for growing roses and a hothouse. These natural attractions were placed near the boundary of the

park

. Two rose gardens were at the top left and right hand of the map, similar

with

Change preposition

show examples

the other one from the Eldon Street side.

Likewise

, a glasshouse was located nearly at the bottom doors.

Finally

, for enjoying music, there is a round, open building on the left with seating not far away. Moving on

the

Change preposition

to the

show examples

bottom map, giving more recognition towards

youngster

Fix the agreement mistake

youngsters

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and people in general, the

park

has been modernized since the advent of

amphitheatre

Add an article

the amphitheatre

an amphitheatre

show examples

, children’s playground and coffee shops. Unfortunately, the fountain has been replaced by a square of rose gardens with grouped seats, and the pond is brought to the bottom right corner.

On the contrary

, the

park

has added a new entrance and an underground car

park

. In conclusion, there have been many developments throughout the years.

Numbers

Fix the agreement mistake

Number

show examples

of attractions were added. Some of the

olds

Correct your spelling

old ones

show examples

are removed or replaced. The new adjustment may eventually lead to more visitors visiting the

park

Submitted by nugentsr on Wed May 01 2024

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task achievement

Ensure all relevant information from the maps is included, focusing on both the similarities and changes over time.

coherence cohesion

Use a range of cohesive devices effectively to help the essay flow more naturally.

task achievement

Integrate more specific examples or details from the maps to support your analysis.

coherence cohesion

Try to clearly distinguish between past and present features to avoid confusion.

coherence cohesion

You provided a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your essay.

task achievement

You have made a good attempt to describe the changes that occurred in the park over time.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

258 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

recreational facilities
landscaping
naturalistic
amenities
formal gardens
ergonomic
symmetric designs
inclusive
accessible
accommodations
native plant species
societal changes
visitor services
community events
evolution
modern playgrounds
wildflower meadows

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The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Government should put taxes on unhealthy food so that people eat healthy foods more. Do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, governments encourage businesses to move outside of the cities to solve the problems of housing and transport in the cities. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this policy?

Planting trees is very important for the environment. Some people says trees should be planted in the vacant areas of cities and towns, while other says housing facilities should be built instead. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, plastic shopping bags are the main source of rubbish. They cause water and land pollution, and so they should be banned. To what extent do you agree with this statement?