In many countries paying for things using mobile phones (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?

#countries #phones #cellphone #apps #development

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In the world's modern society, smartphones might be a necessary part of living survival because people use them for most of every transaction purchase.

This

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essay will illustrate the benefits outweigh the drawbacks regarding

this

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progressive development with some described instances.

To begin

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with,in the past,most people who are boomer generation prefer paying by cash because they believe in the physical value of money. Nowadays, developments in mobile phone functions productively facilitate any financial transaction

such

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as paying electronic bills, online purchasing, and individual saving. To exemplify

this

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statement, the public needs to carry an amount of adequate cash to buy a new car in the past.

Nevertheless

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,buying a new vehicle by transferring payment from

Correct determiner usage

one

show examples

bank account to

other

Correct quantifier usage

another

show examples

which takes a few seconds to complete is simple in

this

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era. So,

this

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is obvious that

this

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function of smartphone is conveniently supportive of daily purchasing activity with the small-developed gadget.

Second,

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avoiding the loss of physical notes is another factor of technological improvement;

thus

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this

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has been developed to alleviate the problem,which encourages people to have less cash in hand.

Conversely

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, using mobile phones for financial transactions might be not appropriate for everyone,especially the elderly who are out of date with new technology. Most of the older generations,who are over 60 years old, cannot use profound features of the applications because they rarely know how to use them compared to new ages.

For example

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, the older still prefer using physical bills rather than electronics

due to

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getting used to it for many decades.

Furthermore

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, if the phone is not working any financial features might not be able to be used at that period of time, so

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also

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an outstanding weakness of new advancement.

To conclude

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, I personally think that the potential benefits outnumber the drawbacks with regard to

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innovation.

However

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, individuals who obtain advantages the most might know how to adapt to align with their style of life.

Submitted by phanphetpor on Wed May 01 2024

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Task Achievement

In your introduction, while sufficiently clear, try to provide a more directly competing comparison of advantages and disadvantages to instantly guide the reader about your stance.

Coherence & Cohesion

Be sure to diversify your linking words to add complexity to your argument structure. This can elevate the overall cohesion of your essay.

Task Achievement

Consider including a wider range of examples, especially in areas where your arguments could be grounded more realistically to everyday scenarios. This will strengthen your task achievement score.

Task Achievement

When discussing the disadvantages, include more elaborated scenarios or statistics to solidify your argument and create a more balanced view.

Task Achievement

You have effectively illustrated the benefits and provided examples, showing a good understanding of the essay's requirements.

Coherence & Cohesion

The logical structure of your essay, with clear paragraphs dedicated to each main point, enhances the readability and argument flow.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – advantages
Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

The main advantage is...
The disadvantage of this...
The main benefit...
Despite these advantages...
One possible drawback...

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13
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

321 words

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In many countries paying for things using mobile phones (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

Some people believe that tourist should accept social and environmental responsibility while other believe that tourists should not accept any responsibility at all. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Eco-tourism often involves visiting remote and fragile ecosystems, which raises concerns about the impact on local cultures and indigenous communities. What problems can this cause? How can these problems be resolved?

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement protecting the environment is the responsibility of government use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

In the past, school children usually learnt by listening to their teacher and by studying their books. Nowadays, many school children learn by using technology in the classroom instead. What do you think are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?