For some people, shopping is not just about buying what is necessary, but is a form of entertainment. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#people #form #entertainment #development

In contemporary society, shopping has evolved beyond a mere act of acquiring necessities; for many, it has become a form of

entertainment

While

this

phenomenon has both positive and negative implications, I contend that its impact largely depends on individual perspectives and

behaviors

Change the spelling

behaviours

show examples

. On the positive side, viewing shopping as

entertainment

can contribute to economic growth. Consumer spending drives demand, stimulating production and employment opportunities.

Additionally

, the retail sector thrives, offering diverse choices and experiences to consumers. For some, the act of browsing through stores, trying on various items, and making purchases

provides

Change the verb form

provide

show examples

a sense of enjoyment and

fulfillment

Change the spelling

fulfilment

show examples

, akin to participating in recreational activities.

This

can enhance

overall

well-being by alleviating stress and fostering social interactions, especially when shopping is done with friends or family.

However

, there are

also

negative aspects to consider. Excessive shopping for

entertainment

purposes can lead to financial strain and debt accumulation. Impulsive buying, influenced by marketing strategies and societal pressures, may result in overspending on items that are unnecessary or even detrimental to one's financial health.

Moreover

, the culture of consumerism fueled by

entertainment

-oriented shopping can contribute to environmental degradation through increased waste generation and resource depletion. In conclusion,

while

the transformation of shopping into a form of

entertainment

has both positive and negative ramifications, its

overall

impact varies depending on individual choices and societal norms. To mitigate the negative effects, consumers should cultivate mindful shopping habits, focusing on genuine needs rather than fleeting desires.

Likewise

, policymakers and businesses have a role to play in promoting sustainable consumption practices and ethical marketing strategies. Ultimately, striking a balance between the enjoyment derived from shopping and its responsible practice is essential for fostering a healthier and more sustainable consumer culture.

Submitted by gunawankohan on Wed May 01 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Integrate specific examples to support your arguments. Including real-life instances or statistical data can enhance the validity and persuasiveness of your points.

coherence cohesion

Consider using a wider variety of linking words and phrases to improve the flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

While your essay is well-structured, working on paragraph transitions could make the flow of ideas smoother, further enhancing readability.

task achievement

Your essay provides a thoughtful analysis of both sides of the argument, recognizing the complexity of the issue.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are both clearly articulated, effectively framing the discussion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

284 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
In many parts of the world today there is a profitable market for products which lighten or whiten people's skin. Outline the reasons for using such products and discuss what effects they have in terms of health and society. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.
Every woman nowadays has a skincare routine. There are a variety of skincare these days ranging from serum, moisturizer, sunscreen, and toner. Each type of product has its benefits such as slowing the signs of aging, brightening, hydration, and reviving dull-looking skin. However, while I believe that such products are beneficial to the individual, I agree that they have had damaging effects in terms of health and society.
<4
band
When a country becomes richer, the natural environment will suffer. It is not possible for a country to both develop its economy and protect the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Many people belived that the natural emvroment will suffer. it is not possible for a country to both develop its economy and protect the environment.
6
band
What are the advantages and disadvantages of working remotely? What is the future of remote work? Include any relevant example from your own experience.
About three years ago, the Covid-19 pandemic hit the planet and made everyone, including companies, change their routines. Hence, several companies changed their strategies and become some departments remotely, which created new opportunities for those who always wished to work from home. Although remote work provides several benefits, especially comfortable and peace, others are concerned about traditional positions where people used to work in person. In this relevant topic, I'd like to share my viewpoint referents both sides and the future of working remotely.
4
band
Some people think that young people should go to university to further their education while others think they should be encouraged to work as a car mechanic or builders etc. to serve society.discuss both views and give your opinion
A group of people believes that teenagers should go to university to further their study life while the other groups of humans support they should be encouraged to work as a machine mechanic or builders etc. to serve society. In this essay both views are discussed.
5
band
Some people think multiple choice tests are better than tests which require you to write an essay. Other people think that tests which require you to write an essay are better. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In the present age, there has been much discussion revolving around the issue of whether it is better to take multiple choice tests or the ones which require you to write an essay. Many assert that one with a variety of answers is more valuable, whereas others may argue that the essay one is more impactful. This essay will examine both points of view.

For some people, shopping is not just about buying what is necessary, but is a form of entertainment. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

When a country becomes richer, the natural environment will suffer. It is not possible for a country to both develop its economy and protect the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

What are the advantages and disadvantages of working remotely? What is the future of remote work? Include any relevant example from your own experience.

Some people think that young people should go to university to further their education while others think they should be encouraged to work as a car mechanic or builders etc. to serve society.discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people think multiple choice tests are better than tests which require you to write an essay. Other people think that tests which require you to write an essay are better. Discuss both views and give your opinion.