in many countries in the world people buy clothes and choose hairstyles according to latest fashion. why is this happening? is this a positive or a negative development?

#countries #world #people #clothes #hairstyles #fashion #development

In several countries worldwide, people buy clothes and choose hairstyles

according to

the latest fashion. I opine that nowadays many modern professions need certain looks in order to gain trust and respect. It is a negative development, in my view,

this

trend could form a depression in the population. On the one hand, the main reason behind

this

trend is many occupations in the modern days can

therefore

gain a positive outcome by following the latest style.

For example

, in Thailand, the lawyer may find it easier to get a client by wearing clothes

according to

the newest fashion.

This

can result in significant profit.

In addition

, it may be difficult for a great number of citizens to trust

such

lawyers who do not choose their appearances

according to

the newest style. Stylish outfits can be

otherwise

projected as an open-minded personality.

On the other hand

, the key problem is buying modern clothes can be

hence

ultimately expensive.

For instance

, in order to follow the latest fashion people need to keep buying new shirts or pants, constantly.

Thus

, one will encounter several financial problems

such

as bankruptcy.

For

this

reason, citizens will develop a negative sense of well-being.

Consequently

, they may find themselves unworthy and can potentially develop depression in most of the population.

To conclude

, from my perspective, the key reason behind

this

prospect is nowadays society a lot of professions need certain looks in order to gain trust and respect. I think that it is a negative development for society.

This

trend could start a noticeable number of depressed people worldwide

Submitted by amittawin on Thu Feb 08 2024

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structure

The essay has a structure, but it needs more clear and distinct paragraphs for introduction, body, and conclusion. Each paragraph should contain one central idea with supporting examples.

introduction/conclusion

Introduction should paraphrase the question and provide a clear thesis statement. The conclusion needs to summarize the main points without adding new information.

coherence

Ensure clear topic sentences at the beginning of each body paragraph and use linking words to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs.

support

Give specific examples to support your main points. Each claim should be backed up with evidence or an example that is directly related to the question.

task response

Address the question directly and make sure to discuss both parts of the question: why the trend is happening and its positive or negative impact.

language

Avoid ambiguous expressions and keep the language formal. Check for grammar and vocabulary errors to improve clarity and accuracy.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

263 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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in many countries in the world people buy clothes and choose hairstyles according to latest fashion. why is this happening? is this a positive or a negative development?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

Some people think it does not matter if a professional sportsman or sportswoman misbehaves on or off the field if they play well. What is your opinion about this?

In some parts of the world, it is increasingly popular to research the history of one’s own family. Is this a positive or negative development?

do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages on using social media to all ages

Some people think that the best way for the government to solve the problem of traffic congestion in cities is to provide free public transport 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Do you agree or disagree with this idea?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+